Please Drink Responsibly

Ep. 128 | Your Sign To Be Petty

You Got Male

Ask us anything, we know it all!

Ever wondered how Netflix's password-sharing policies and Shane Gillis' new series "Tires" could spark a hilarious conversation? We kick things off with some lighthearted banter about podcast intros and transitions into a discussion about Netflix's quirky algorithms. We even sprinkle in some comedic twists about multiple personalities before diving into our drink of the week—Zach’s introduction of the luxurious Ron Zacapa Centenario XO. Trust us, you'll want to hear about this premium rum's unique aging process and rich, smooth flavors.

As we journey through the world of fine spirits, we recount an amusing anecdote about forgetting dark chocolates and instead bringing a special bottle of rum to our get-together. This segues into our tasting experience with Diplomatico Ambassador, a top-tier rum from a private collection that left us in awe. We compare various premium rums and tequilas, share a humorous tequila tasting in Arizona, and even discuss flasks' practicality. And for those getting serious about their home bar setup, we toy with the idea of creating an illuminated display for our cherished bottles.

Our spirited chat doesn’t stop there—we venture into beers and seltzers, breaking down everything from hazy IPAs to Mexican-style lagers with insights from a cicerone friend. We ponder what makes a lager a lager and dive into the trend of slushy beers. Not one to miss out on cocktails, we also share our experiences with standout drinks at Phoenix bars, including a smoked tequila old-fashioned and a lemon meringue pie-inspired cocktail. Wrapping up, we touch on everything from memorable outings to hilarious viral videos, making this episode a rollercoaster of laughs and liquor appreciation.

We know more than Google and Musk combined, go ahead and send your questions to:
YouGotMalePod@gmail.com

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Speaker 1:

Welcome to you. Got Mail the manliest podcast on the internet. That was really good man.

Speaker 2:

That sent chills down my spine.

Speaker 1:

Bananas.

Speaker 2:

Welcome to you. Got Mail, the manliest podcast on the internet. Hey, you're kicking it. You want to go ahead? No, you go.

Speaker 1:

No, you had something to say.

Speaker 2:

No, you go. You're kicking it With no, you, no, you go, you go. You're kicking back with withegan, norm and Zach. Hey, there we go.

Speaker 1:

Nice, we were on the same page.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah, I was trying to get in there with a chorus like you're kicking back. Yeah it was just like a slight echo. Yeah, sorry. No, it's okay, we'll get the timing better, we'll practice it off the pod and then we'll come back next week and we will do it better practice it off the pod, and then we'll come back next week and we will do it better. We won't do it actually.

Speaker 1:

We're not going to do it. Zach's going to forget about this bit, for sure. I already forgot about this bit.

Speaker 2:

I stopped caring about the bit halfway through the sentence. I was like, well, I should probably at least finish the sentence.

Speaker 1:

So I did.

Speaker 2:

Hey, you guys see that new Netflix series with Shane Gillis Tires.

Speaker 1:

No, but it is pretty funny.

Speaker 2:

It was based off of a YouTube series he was gonna do like 15 years ago and I watched that YouTube video. Dude, hilarious, but I didn't watch the new show. I also don't have Netflix because they're such bitches about their password sharing.

Speaker 1:

It's so annoying.

Speaker 2:

I do technically at the moment have my ex's Netflix, so I was thinking about just watching a bunch of terrible things just to mess up her algorithm. Okay, but I wouldn't actually watch anything I want to watch on there. I would just put on a bunch of garbage.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, you know, I mean that's a good plan though.

Speaker 2:

And then maybe just start a new account on there and I'll just watch, like all things for babies yeah, change it to kids only yeah, yeah just change your password while I'm in there.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, that'd be funny and overall, and then just steal her account just steal her account, yeah, and then identity yeah cool, it should become one with yeah, actually I was.

Speaker 2:

when I say, when I say x, it was really just a different version of me in a wig, holy shit, you're already full meta. Yeah, you're already there, dude. I have schizophrenia where I have multiple personalities and I'm dating.

Speaker 1:

I dated a couple of them, dude. That makes jacking off so much fun though.

Speaker 2:

You would think, until halfway through I switch back and then it's gay.

Speaker 1:

Well, no, it's not gay, it's just normally jacking off.

Speaker 2:

No, I turn into another guy.

Speaker 1:

Oh, you got other guys in here too. Yeah, I got other guys in here too. It's not all great Then, that is gay, because then you're getting a handjob from a guy.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and I caught myself cheating with myself.

Speaker 1:

Oh fuck, I did that.

Speaker 2:

Is the guy Uh one of them.

Speaker 1:

Well then there's a Keegan in there.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, Keegan's always like at the base level. It's like split you know, yeah, it's like moon night.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

Other personalities take over, but I'm like trapped inside watching, so you know, go watch, uh tires by pretty funny.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, that's the we actually that's we actually. That's a promo Netflix artist To do for Tires. Pretty funny. Yeah, we forgot to talk About the show. Fuck, pretty funny show.

Speaker 2:

We did talk about Netflix, though.

Speaker 1:

So that'll do yeah.

Speaker 2:

We met. We met 50% of the criteria.

Speaker 1:

Maybe we taught Some people out there that there's a kids only Netflix, you know.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and also you know Gave.

Speaker 1:

You know, yeah, and also you know, gave somebody some ideas for being petty you know, yeah, hopefully steal your ex's netflix account you don't gotta steal it, but like it's probably still logged in so you can just like use it, that's fine yeah, no, I forgot about that, because I think the last time you told me you didn't have netflix, I was like just take mine and you're like no I can't.

Speaker 2:

And I was like, oh yeah, that's fucking dumb I'd have the same problem, just with you now instead of my mom.

Speaker 1:

Well, hey, zach, your light works again. You want to turn that off, though it's fucking with my mood. Dude, bright, dude, the whole ambiance of this place the feng shui it's off.

Speaker 2:

Uh, better sick. I almost started raging right there, dude that would have been reaching alcoholics no, speaking of raging alcoholics, I brought the liquor this week. Great transition, zach, thanks for getting us back on track.

Speaker 1:

I hardly knew her.

Speaker 2:

Off the rails for a minute. Whoa, I splurged a little bit this week.

Speaker 1:

This looks fucking crazy.

Speaker 2:

I went and bought myself a nice old bottle of rum, ronza Capa Centenario XO. The XO means that it has been aged for a minimum of 10 years, with a blend of rums up to 25 years in their Solera aging system, which they're very proud of. For those at home who don't know a Solera aging system, imagine a bunch of wine barrels arranged in a triangle or a pyramid, with the bottom row being the oldest barrels and the top row being the newest barrels, and what you would do is you would slowly pour out wine from the bottom barrel and then they blend it with or I said wine, but in this case it's liquor. Now you take liquor from the bottom barrel and you'd blend it with liquor from the higher levels in order to create the perfect flavor profile for what you're doing. All the barrels also were different. There's some, uh, sherry barrels in there. There's some an american oak bourbon barrels.

Speaker 1:

American whiskeys delicate cherries, pedro Jimenez and French oak that previously aged cognac.

Speaker 2:

Yes, and they always finish it in the cognac barrels, so it should have a nice smooth ending. It says it pairs well with dark chocolate or orange. Would be great. This box is crazy. I was going to bring some dark chocolates but I forgot as I was leaving. I also wasn't even going to bring this bottle, because I bought it today and I was like this might be just a special occasion bottle. And then I thought, well, if I can't share the nice liquor with the people I care about, then I don't even want it, I agree.

Speaker 2:

Well, you can still do that, yeah.

Speaker 1:

I hope we have some of it left. No, I won't even want it, I agree. Well, you can still do that, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean, I hope we have some of it left, you know? No, I won't.

Speaker 2:

But it's no. Have as much as you want, though I'm sure it's going to be delicious. And what inspired this is at the bar, our manager brought in Diplomatico Ambassador, which is like a.

Speaker 1:

Did that come in today like a equivalent? Did that come in today?

Speaker 2:

It's not for sale. It's from Joe's private collection. He just brought it down to have me taste because he's like I know you like rum and I was like I do. And then I tried it and I was like holy shit, how good was it. Fantastic.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, best rum you ever had. Top three Top three, top three for sure, top three for sure.

Speaker 2:

And Top three for sure. And then I went and I looked for a bottle. It's a hard to find bottle, but it's not too expensive if you can find it. That's the cool thing about rum, rum is never really that expensive. How much was this bottle? This was $110. That's not terrible. It's not terrible. That's expensive for rum.

Speaker 1:

Like tequila.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I almost bought two bottles of Don Fulano instead of one bottle of this. But then I was like you know what I want myself? A nice little bottle. Also, my parents went to Alaska and they bought me a flask. It's my first flask and I figured I want to just fill it with something nice. Blantons are better. That was my standard, okay, and then I would just have a little flask full of something nice. If you go somewhere, you can just be like I'm gonna bring something for me to sip on. But I also got like the thing about flasks. They're metal. I want a plastic one because then I can sneak it places. Yeah, you know metal ones. I still can't bring that to disneyland without them no, you know you know, yeah, so I need a plastic one.

Speaker 2:

Fill that with something nice, yeah, but anywho, all right, let's drink rum.

Speaker 1:

Oh yeah, dude. Yeah, I got to. I was in Arizona the last two days because my wife is crazy, but we went to a bar and I was just I just wanted to. They had a really nice tequila selection, where it wasn't a lot of tequilas but I could tell they're all really good because they had like fortaleza and g4 and don fulano and like all these good quality tequilas. Um, so I just asked the, the bartenders. I was like what's your guys favorite? You carry back there? And they'll. Because I asked their price of fortaleza and she's like I like fortaleza, I just don't like to pay the price because it's just getting more expensive. But she was like we do carry Tapatio 101 and Reposado. She was like both those are really good. So I tried the Tapatio Reposado and it was fucking incredible.

Speaker 2:

Man. Hot sauce, now tequila.

Speaker 1:

These guys are killing it, so I guess it's the same company that makes G4, I think it is also makes Tapatio.

Speaker 2:

G4, the energy drink powder.

Speaker 1:

No, the tequila. This is G4 tequila also.

Speaker 2:

There is a G4 energy drink, correct, okay, wait, no, no, that's not GamerFuel, no, there's a G4. I don't think there's a. I'm looking for that. There is C4. There is C4. Energy drink.

Speaker 1:

There was a G4 video game channel back in the day.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, with Olivia Munn. Yeah, yeah, she was on Attack of the Show. I'm looking for the G6 te. You remember when that song was cool?

Speaker 1:

Like a G6, like a G6, now, now, now, now, now I'm feeling so fly Bottles in the ice Like a blizzard.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, when we drink, we do it nice, we do it right, we do it right Getting slithered Sipping scissor in my ride. Yeah, like 3-6.

Speaker 1:

Now I'm feeling so fly.

Speaker 2:

Like a G6. Like a G6. Dude, cheers, Cheers. Thanks for this Keegan. This is cool. I'm excited to try this. This is probably the fanciest rum I've ever tried.

Speaker 1:

This is probably the fanciest rum I've ever tried as well. Smells great. Smells like exactly what you'd want rum to smell like. It's like sugary, but not in a bad way.

Speaker 2:

Caramelly, it's good.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, that's really nice oh dude, the finish on that is incredible. Yeah yeah, it like just goes down. It's just like it almost takes a second too, like you start swallowing and it just hangs out there for a second. Damn Dude, that's fucking good. The Diplomatico is better. It is yeah, would you say this is top five, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

This is probably one of the best rooms I've ever had. This is in my top three for sure.

Speaker 2:

For sure.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

For sure, and this will be in my nice little I don't know when I'll drink it. You should. You know what?

Speaker 1:

you should get. You should also, because you have a pretty big at home bar. You should get like a nicer, maybe even glass case that you can put lights in, just for your nice shit or just like it, maybe it only has like six shelves, but you can put hella nice shit in it yeah, that'd be sick.

Speaker 2:

Or just one of those like actual, uh, like bar shelves that have the lights underneath it and I can just keep all my premium bottles up there. But then I have to get one premium of everything right. Is there even a premium gin? I guess Monkey 47's a premium gin. That's probably the most expensive bottle I could go for. I bet you there's a crazy expensive bottle of gin, I bet you?

Speaker 1:

That's one of the things. What about vodka's? Like a crazy expensive bottle of gin, I bet you.

Speaker 2:

That's one of the things. What about vodka? Is there a crazy expensive?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I'm sure there is, there's.

Speaker 2:

Jewel of Russia. Jewel of Russia is actually super fucking good.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

Jewel of Russia is yeah, it's our most expensive vodka we carry at the restaurant.

Speaker 1:

I think it's like $780 bottle of gin at Total Wine right now.

Speaker 2:

Could you point it out in a lineup Like if I gave you like five, if I gave you like four vodkas, could you tell me which one is Jewel?

Speaker 1:

of Russia Maybe. Maybe, this is called no let's Dry Gin, the Reserve, and it's $780 for a bottle of gin.

Speaker 2:

Alright, no thanks.

Speaker 1:

Holland highlights the precious aromas of warm, spicy saffron and subtle, delicate verbena. It's precious botanicals and individually distilled to yield the highest concentration and purity of all natural flavors and aroma you don't necessarily have to get a nice bottle of every single spirit you could just do that for sipping bottles. Although there is a vodka you should look for that would be cool to have. I don't even know if they still make it, but if they do, you try to find it.

Speaker 2:

Ciroc, yeah, they make it.

Speaker 1:

Belvedere makes a high rye blend vodka. It's not good.

Speaker 2:

And it's super unique. It's not I like. I loved it, but I like it comes in the. It comes in the black, the black bottle with the well it's a clear bottle but it black accents. Yeah oh really, it's a clear bottle.

Speaker 1:

I can have a different one, it looks like a gray goose bottle, but instead of blue it's black yeah, yeah, exactly yeah, that's what I said yeah, we have. We had that one yeah, at the restaurant I didn't like it so much. I loved it, but it is.

Speaker 2:

It's just super different for vodka there's that one nevada vodka that we actually have oh yeah, that shit's pretty good.

Speaker 1:

That shit's actually pretty fucking good.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, that stuff's good I think I could pick that one out of a lineup, yeah you would be able to pick the rye, because it has some.

Speaker 1:

It has some characteristics to it why is there a bottle of monkey 47 ginseng for 360 uh first edition?

Speaker 2:

like dead ass, I don't know. Uh, there is a series of like bottles that are collectible and I can't remember if it's scotch or whiskey or like bourbon, but uh, compass box you've heard of yeah, compass box is dope dude, they uh always drop their uh bottles like they're going to be collector's items, uh, so they do it like seasonally and there's like one time they encourage you to go to the distillery and like camp out the night before to try to get these collectibles, uh, but sometimes they're they're not worth shit and sometimes they're worth like an absurd amount of money just because of the label they have on it.

Speaker 2:

You can find it for $2,500 plus, but the bottle itself is only like $1.50 to $200.

Speaker 1:

Compass Box is cool.

Speaker 2:

I haven't even tried Compass Box, but we did get the Mictors 10-year oh dude, that shit is hella good, dude.

Speaker 1:

That's top two. So I was talking to Jomar too the more I've been trying whiskey that's exclusively made of corn, or at least high corn in their mash build. I really like that. It has a certain taste like it's almost vegetal. I love the taste of that and that mictors is corn, um, and that's really good. And then I actually tried one recently. It's a texas bourbon, it's called yellow rose yeah, and they haven't never mind.

Speaker 1:

I thought I knew it, they have an outlaw version is what they call, but it's 100 corn and I tried that and that shit is really good. Is it overproof? It's like 46 percent, so it's not overproof.

Speaker 2:

I feel like a lot of these bourbons that I've been seeing, especially like the more expensive ones, they always tend to be higher proofed. This is still only 40%.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, the rum yeah.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, which is pretty cool.

Speaker 1:

It was really good though.

Speaker 2:

What's your guys' favorite style of beer?

Speaker 1:

Sour really good, though. What's your guys' favorite style of beer? Sour, mine's probably still sour. Yeah, yeah, sour's good Sour. Or like I like hazy IPA, because it's usually just super fruity and I'm into like a fruity taste in beer.

Speaker 2:

I also don't mind like a pilsner.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, what's a pilsner. Or I like like Bud yeah, what's, yeah. Or I like uh like bud light I like uh, the cheap beers are pilsners I like mexican style lagers too.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, like I love pacifico and corona and modelo and fucking do you guys know what like makes a lager a lager and like what makes a pilsner a pilsner and stuff like that? Though?

Speaker 1:

no, but our buddy stone does. He is a cicerone um, I know when, when it gets to, I know when it gets to ipas and stuff, they measure it with ibus, which is like their bitter scale, and then you can. It depends on how much like hops they're throwing in that shit like a pale, ale yeah, so I assume it's got a deal with.

Speaker 2:

That's the only one that's the only one that I know a little bit about, which is that pale ales, like ipas, they use top fermenting yeasts, um, that like help, basically like hold over the flavor of it. So I don't know, I don't really know the science behind it.

Speaker 2:

I don't even know how they make sours I know that they do it at high temperatures with top fermenting yeasts and that's, to be honest with you, the only thing I know about beer. But I'm studying for my test and like I went through the beer section and I was like I know beer pretty well and then I started like getting asked questions on it and I was like I don't know fucking beer at all dude. I was like god dang, I just drank a lot of it yeah, I was all like dang.

Speaker 2:

I just realized right now I actually don't know anything about beer, I just like drinking them, and so I was like, oh, all right this says sour beers are made by intentionally adding bacteria or yeast to the brewing process to create a tart or acidic flavor.

Speaker 1:

These bacterias and yeast feed on sugars and beer. That's how you make alcohol, though, isn't it?

Speaker 2:

that's, it's not nothing yeah, but not bacteria, not bacteria.

Speaker 1:

I guess they might be adding like a certain type of bacteria that sour beer is one that has results and deliberately brewed to achieve high levels of acidity is a little. How does the beer become sour? Sour process yeah, it's just acid producing, bacteriacing bacteria yeah, that makes sense.

Speaker 1:

Okay, yeah, Because sometimes in like wine and stuff, they'll introduce like a certain style of yeast. Yeah, they list three kinds of the bacteria they use to produce it. They all have weird-ass names, but yeah, so it's just a bacteria that produces. After each sugar, it produces acid. Yeah, yeah, that's pretty cool, but yeah, I had an acidic beer over the last two days. I had this tart cherry beer and that shit was fucking delicious, dude.

Speaker 2:

I'm not a big fan of any beers that you have to roll across the counter before they give them to you.

Speaker 1:

Some of them I like Some of them I like. Some of them are too much. But yeah, the slushy style of beer they're doing now is getting a little weird, because it's almost like I could chew my beer.

Speaker 2:

Right, I'm like, this is no longer beer.

Speaker 1:

It is, but no, yeah, but it's like a smoothie with I don't know, maybe it should be its own category. Yeah, I was talking to Chris about that, and I feel like I'd categorize ciders as beers, but not seltzers.

Speaker 2:

Right yeah.

Speaker 1:

Right, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2:

Seltzer's wine.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, or like sparkling malt liquor right Like carbonated malt liquor.

Speaker 2:

If we had to break everything down in between to being wine or beer, I'd probably say seltzers or wine, more wine than beer yeah, I would have meant no, because they're usually malt liquor, so that would make it a beer. But some of them are from fruit and that would make it wine? Yeah, some of them are like vodka-based and shit, but fruit flavors doesn't count.

Speaker 1:

What do you think your favorite seltzer you've ever had is?

Speaker 2:

Um, oh shoot those Tuesday seltzer you've ever had is. Um, oh shoot those tuesday ones.

Speaker 1:

Aren't bad those tuesday ones are pretty good. They're non-carbonated, they're really easy to drink, they have a bright flavor. Or thursday, I don't remember which one, oh yeah, it's thursday happy thursday, yeah, something like that. Those are those are pretty, those are fire um the el jimador.

Speaker 2:

Those aren't. Those aren't seltzers, those are canned cocktails, but those were fantastic no, they are seltzers.

Speaker 1:

They're made with malt, liquor yeah, but they're not carbonated yeah, they are el jimador margaritas and stuff yeah, well, they're not technically margaritas, they're just flavored seltzers. They're just lime, pineapple, whatever, whatever, but they are seltzers. They're made with, uh, malt liquor, they're not cocktails. Then those, yeah, those, I think, are my favorite. Those have the best taste. Yeah, they nailed it. They nailed it hot.

Speaker 2:

Take bro seltzers, like are not where the hype is at for me anymore. Uh, you, big like the hard teas, you're drinking something from a can. What, uh, what are you leaning? Beer? Beer, yeah, or a four loco, if I'm feeling crazy, see that's dumb.

Speaker 1:

you're just drinking a four lo. If I'm feeling crazy, see that's dumb, you're just dumb. Drinking a Four Loko and not a seltzer is stupid. That's wrong.

Speaker 2:

No, but here's the thing the Four Loko is the go-hard option. You know what I mean?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, so I'm saying when we all hang out on Friday and we want a drink, we go to the fridge and we usually crack a seltzer or a beer. It's sometimes beer, but like I'm cool with either of. Those are like chill and sip on.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, there's nothing chill or casual about it.

Speaker 1:

Cause like if we go and we start having cocktails, then I mean I I'll only have like two cocktails and then I'll be like I should probably slow down on cocktails you know when I can have two seltzers and be like I can have two more seltzers.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, you know, I'm good for six.

Speaker 1:

Well, yeah, if we're hanging out for like six hours, I'm going to be like, if I want something, to continue to sip on seltzers.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah, and I think those El Himador ones might be the best. Yeah, perfect, that's what I said, or the Lipton ones, if we're shotgunning.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, Lipton's are good because they don't have carbonation.

Speaker 2:

I think we've tried them all and they taste like tea.

Speaker 1:

We've tried a lot. Anytime I go to the store and I see a new one, I buy it.

Speaker 2:

We always grab the new one.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, that's why me and you both bought those Thursday ones.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2:

We didn't ones. We haven't tried yet. Yeah, yeah, and those were pretty good. Yeah, they're super fire. So seltzers are getting better, white claw and truly's. I don't even want them in my fridge anymore, really yeah, I'm not a huge fan either.

Speaker 1:

Truly actually put out this pack for like fourth the july or, yeah, fourth of july, and they have a cotton candy flavor in it and that's actually pretty good. I tried it.

Speaker 2:

It's fire sounds sweet, sounds sweet.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, it is sweet, but it's not like too sweet. It doesn't taste like straight up sugar like you'd think, but it does just taste like artificial cotton candy, which is kind of cool.

Speaker 2:

What was that other weird shit you got? That was cotton candy flavored and it did taste like straight up sugar.

Speaker 1:

It was, I don't know if it was like a weird soda. I know what you're talking about.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, it was a soda and it was cotton, it was um and it was just sugar, sugar on. No, it was the peeps. Pepsi, yeah, it was soda yeah, and it did.

Speaker 1:

it tasted like you were drinking a melted peep yeah, because that's all. Peep is sugar, although. So me and chris, we went to this bar in Phoenix called Quartz, with a Q yeah, and so their cocktail menu. They had 12 cocktails on their menu and they were based off every birthstone, but the one Krista ordered was this it tasted like you were drinking a lemon meringue pie, because what they did was built this like super tart lemony cocktail and then they put like a homemade marshmallow fluff on top that was like no, they didn't brulee it, but they because it wasn't like baked alaska, but they just left it there.

Speaker 1:

But you literally had to, like, when you started to sip it, you literally had to like suck out the marshmallow to get the drink to come through, or else, if you just like turned it, the marshmallow was so thick it wouldn't let the drink pass through. So it was like a cool experience of like you had to get all of it together and when you did it, literally it tasted incredible it was super cool.

Speaker 2:

When you order it, do they have to do the dairy queen blizzard test?

Speaker 1:

they? That would be cool. If they did, I definitely think the drink would fall out. Yeah, because it wasn't that thick, but it was like thick marshmallow. Like if you didn't, if you just try to like sip through the marshmallow, it won't work for sure. You have to like get it out of the glass was that her birthstone?

Speaker 1:

no, she picked the month after her birthstone, I think, and I didn't pick my birthstone either. What'd you get? I got this. Like they had like a smoked tequila, old-fashioned, that had. Like they put a quartz inside of the ice sphere. That's cool. So yeah, so there's a rock in there, if I wanted to. I didn't, though, Like like I could have took the ice out when I finished the drink.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah, which would have been cool I would have been, um, but uh, that that.

Speaker 1:

That was the same bar where I also asked the bartenders about the tequila. That's where I tried the tapatio, um. And then we went to another really cool bar. That was called the trophy room and it's inside of a restaurant, but it's it's like hidden in the back, um, and it's themed like teddy roosevelt's hunting room, like they put a bunch of rifles everywhere and they have like old pictures of like uh, hunters on the wall and stuff, um, and they actually make you lock your phone in a locker when you go in. You're not allowed to take your phone. So that was super cool, um.

Speaker 1:

But krista had like one of the best cocktails she's ever liked there and I'm gonna forget what it is. It was fucking. I'm gonna have to look up the ingredients. But I had some two. I ordered the unique shit because they had two fat wash cocktails and one of them was a duck fat washed like manhattan style, and then another one was a truffle washed uh, uh, old-fashioned, and the truffle shit was like super truffly so it tasted very like dirt like kind of it just literally tasted like you were like eating, yeah, like drinking truffle oil almost, but like what kind of bourbon do you know?

Speaker 1:

it was good bourbon. It was like cocktails. There were like 19 bucks, which aren't terrible, maybe four roses. Um, it was something better than that. I forgot what it was, but their selection was sick. They had a really cool cocktail menu. Um, I think arizona has just some of the best bars. Yeah, I've ever been to it's what it seems. Melinda'sey was closed both days. We were out there, though, so I was pretty upset about that. Bummer, yeah, they're closed like Monday, tuesday and Wednesday, I think, damn, so they're only open like Thursday through Sunday. Yeah, we should take a boys' trip again there. Go back to some bars.

Speaker 2:

I hell of a want to do that. You guys couldn't handle me on another boys trip.

Speaker 1:

I don't know if we could if you're drinking, like me and Keegan are. I don't know if we could see. That's my thing. I go out with drinks for Krista and it's like she has one. And then she's like and I'm like dude, I want to order three more cocktails at this place. But Krista's like oh, we should go somewhere else. I'm like dude yeah, I could easily. Actually, krista was like I'm not gonna have another one, but you should keep it.

Speaker 1:

But then I'd feel bad even though she genuinely means it, she doesn't give a shit. She would just sit there, not drinking.

Speaker 2:

I might not be able to drink as much as you boys, that's a fact, but my vibes are impeccable. I think you could keep up.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, you could keep up.

Speaker 2:

You could keep up Honestly, and I don't drink that much.

Speaker 1:

I don't drink like crazy, especially if I'm going out. I just like to. I like to try at least a cocktail at every place, Like I'm cool with having one cocktail cashing out leaving going With, like having one cocktail cashing out, leaving going somewhere else. Maybe like three places, yeah, but if one place blows my mind, yeah if one place, then I'll get like two, yeah, maybe three, but then I don't want to leave if I get three cocktails there.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, that's how I felt at Liquid Diet, like I ended the night there and I was like this is just where I want to be now. We need to go back there.

Speaker 1:

Do you wear Saturday? Yeah, we probably shouldn't go down there on a Saturday, though, huh.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I mean, we could you think it'll be bad, I don't know. Like packed, it'll be busier, but honestly I went on like a Wednesday or some shit last time and that's when I think it would be fun because I ran into all the fucking industry people in one night, I mean if you're down to go on a day like I work but.

Speaker 1:

If you want to wait for me to get off work one night? I'm hella down to go yeah.

Speaker 2:

And we got to check out Velveteen's new cocktail. Oh yeah, that's right. I was looking at them online. They look pretty good. Yeah, dude, I don't remember any of them, but I remember being impressed. Yeah, dude, velveteen's the sickest.

Speaker 1:

Sickest man, always impressed, always impressed. I'm trying to think if I went to any other. We went to Bitter and Twisted again, that was open. Yeah, that was the first place we went, right, yeah, what was cool about going? So all the bars that were open in Arizona. For those two days, though, it was dead dude Tuesday and Wednesday, no one's out in Arizona, no one's at home chilling. So it was cool, though, because, like me, we didn't make reservations for anything. Me and chris were just walking in every bar, fucking completely empty, fucking hanging out. That shit was tight hell yeah we should make a like midweek.

Speaker 1:

It's just fucking they don't party like us man I hate that, since we're both the same position, and nor is, though getting a weekday off is harder than both of us getting a weekend off.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

Because we only have four of us. Yeah, so that means someone has to work. Rudy worked a double for me today, though. Yeah, I texted him last night at like 1030, and I was like is there any chance you want to work tomorrow? And he was like, honestly, yeah, I don't give a fuck. I was like, honestly, yeah, I don't give a fuck. I was like sick. So rudy will work a double for you but he won't take my sunday after I cover his ass, dude.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, he would have missed his daughter's graduation if it wasn't for you. Dude, what the hell? This is crazy, because I was just like either. We were like we were already at the hotel at 10 30 so I was like ready to go to bed because we were gonna have to wake up at like 730 in the morning so we could drive back and I can make it to work. But I was like, let me see if there's a chance. I don't have to be in a rush. And he said yes, because I just, I just, I really avoid asking you to work on days you don't want to work, because I'm like he is just like me, I don't want to work.

Speaker 1:

So I'm like if I can avoid it. So I was like I'll see if Rudy will work a double. And he did.

Speaker 2:

I'm supposed to, I don't know. I think some guys from work are going to go bowling tonight and they wanted me to come and I was like you know what Sounds like fun. I don't hang out with you guys ever so why, not Some of the younger kids. Yeah, they're cool though.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, there's a lot of cool, like a lot of cool kids out there. There's a lot of cool kids out there In the least creepy way possible. Yeah, not in a creepy way, they're 18. Yeah, yeah, they're hangoutable, I can touch them. What, yeah, yeah, you can touch them.

Speaker 2:

I can touch them. They're content. Careful now, yeah, or without. Careful now, yeah. Careful why? That's a crime. Don't want them going falling in love.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, exactly, that's another reason, but mostly the first reason though that it's a crime.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, it's not a crime to touch an 18-year-old. It is not, unless they say hey don't touch me, don't do it.

Speaker 1:

But then they have to go to the cops and provide proof.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and good luck getting away from me then. Yeah, that quick yeah.

Speaker 1:

Wow, yeah, you haven't seen Keegan run when I'm in trouble, when he's in trouble.

Speaker 2:

When I'm about to be in trouble. Yeah, dude, I bet you you're so caught. That's when I'm quick as hell. Hey guys, my Psalm test is this Monday and Tuesday Good luck buddy, Good luck buddy.

Speaker 1:

Where's that at? Wait, it's a two-day test. Yeah, Holy shit.

Speaker 2:

Well, the first day is hell, the first day is a Do they provide you with a meal. Are you allowed to sleep? No, well, I mean, I gotta stay awake for 48 hours. That's crazy. Drink a bunch of wine the whole time, just the first motherfucker.

Speaker 1:

It's just an endurance test.

Speaker 2:

The first day. How much can you drink in 48 hours?

Speaker 1:

the person who drinks the most is the sommelier. The rest of you try again next year.

Speaker 2:

How much do you think you could drink in 48 hours? I'm gonna say six bottles.

Speaker 1:

No, you can drink more than that. I don't know One bottle does get me lit. If I finish a bottle of wine, I'm like fuck yeah dude, it doesn't get me lit, it gets me perfect. I'd agree with that.

Speaker 2:

A bottle and a half, I'm gone.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, a bottle and a half. I'm like what the fuck am I doing here?

Speaker 2:

So I'm saying in two days six bottles. That's a struggle. Still, 48 hours divided by six, what is that?

Speaker 1:

uh, six times seven, eight, six times eight, six times eight, 48, 48 yeah, so it's like seven and a little bit right.

Speaker 2:

No, it's, no, it's eight. Six times six is no 40. 36, right. Oh yeah 42 and then 48. So it'd be eight Eight bottles. One bottle every eight hours. One bottle every eight hours.

Speaker 1:

Dude, I'm like a human. That's hella doable. I'm a human. You could do more. I'm a human calculator. Finished a bottle and waited it. You'd be sober in less than eight hours.

Speaker 2:

Maybe one bottle every four hours.

Speaker 1:

You think I could do ten bottles If you slam the bottle and then you just wait four hours. I think you'd be okay.

Speaker 2:

I think I also have to be able to pick the wine. If I'm doing eight bottles of a Riesling, I think I could get through that better than eight bottles of like a you know a month of Pugiano or fucking something. Mommy will be on me, something that's going to struggle, oh mommy. Or soft Blanc, you know, moscato is going to give me a headache. Oh, somewhat bubbles. Maybe I'll throw a bottle of champagne in there about halfway through, just a nice little break.

Speaker 1:

I've noticed, though, whenever I get wine drunk, I do not get a hangover.

Speaker 2:

No, I just get horny. I get so horny bro.

Speaker 1:

I need to bring wine on the next podcast.

Speaker 2:

We've had wine on plenty of them. I've been bricked up the whole time, Hell yeah dude, that's hot If you guys watching at home.

Speaker 1:

Uh want to go see my boner, just dm me, I'll send you any episode? We're drinking wine free dick pics.

Speaker 2:

Free dick pics. Uh, I can't promise they'll be my dick, but if you dm me I will give you free dick pics. Yeah, you know, andrew's brother still owes me dick pics and I have never gotten them.

Speaker 1:

They guys are pretty trustworthy too, seems like at least.

Speaker 2:

Well, you would think Apparently not, until he tells you I'm going to give you dick pics and then never does. Oh, dude, mr Andrews' brother, what's his name? Julio, one second, no, that's not it, I know it. Oh Tires with Shane Gillis. Good show, huh Go watch it, man.

Speaker 1:

Go see your ex's Netflix. Really funny. Watch the show. Really funny show, full circle moment. It was very good.

Speaker 2:

Full circle, just like a tire. Shane Gillis.

Speaker 1:

Go watch it Funny. Is there anything like the movie Rubber?

Speaker 2:

I doubt it. No, I highly doubt it too. It was a good movie. No, it wasn't.

Speaker 1:

No, it was so bad, it was good though. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I knew what it was. Yeah, it did its job. What did we talk about? Oh yeah, we talked about how bad Mad Max was.

Speaker 2:

We did talk about it. Furiosa was pretty good though. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1:

Not as good as Mad Max, but it was good. It was good. I don't think I'll watch it again anytime soon. I'm glad I watched it once, though I don't think it was as good as Boy Kills World either. No, I don't think so either.

Speaker 2:

Boy Kills World was cool because it was so unique. Yeah, that movie was a real Sick dude Because I had no expectations for that movie whatsoever. I just saw who was in it and I was like down. Yeah, I was just excited, damn yeah, and then I ended up having a good story too.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, that was sick. And some crazy fucking fights, Some crazy twists. At the end, dude, you were like whoa.

Speaker 2:

This guy grabs a cheese grater at a certain point and just fucks up everybody with the cheese grater Just starts ripping.

Speaker 1:

Dude. He made this guy close his armpit on the cheese grater and then he just whipped it and I was like yeah, I threw up in my mouth.

Speaker 2:

It was wild. That was fucking gross. Dude, go watch that movie. I think that's a brazilian right a brazilian wax.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, bb, andre's a bb. That was actually really good, thank you. You thought about singing, uh, yes, but you didn't do it. No, I, I just thought about it. Yeah, I respect that, I did it just then, you did.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, did you get the button on the board that I requested? I didn't. I didn't.

Speaker 1:

What a fucking piece of shit. Zach is dude. What does he do around here? I don't know.

Speaker 2:

I don't know either.

Speaker 1:

I even went back a few days later and I was like got it, here we are well we'll.

Speaker 2:

We'll find out next week when zach hits the button right. Zach, yeah, yeah, you hit the button next week, right, yeah, so let's go ahead and let's just let's go ahead and cut to next week.

Speaker 1:

Uh, we'll cut that we'll we'll re-edit it in after in two weeks in post post fuck in double post, double post.

Speaker 2:

Uh, we'll go ahead and put that in double post that one was worse. Yeah, the first one was better, for sure the nerves got to you um something like that. You know he like, didn't he rap over that?

Speaker 1:

uh, yeah, and there's a new sexy red song. He has a feature and they put it in, but honestly the feature is like mid yeah, fine, why would he do anything?

Speaker 2:

why is he still?

Speaker 1:

going. I don't know. Dude, he's trying to. Shouldn't he shut up? I mean, there's still a lot of people out there who love him. You know what I'm saying. So the kids yeah yeah, actually uh, but uh, but yeah, he should just take a break he should take a break.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, he should step back for just a minute. Yeah, dude, take a break well, you got money.

Speaker 1:

No one wants to hear you right now, dude, truthfully take a break.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, you're just gonna make it worse.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, take a break, or uh, make it worse oh yeah, actually I would love it if you made it. I sent you the thing Jesselnik was saying. No I didn't send you that. No, I was like dude. Jesselnik literally is me. When it comes to Drake, he's just like I fucking hate Drake. He's so fucking corny. I'm like dude. That's exactly how I feel any time I listen to his music. I'm just like this guy's corny.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I just I don't like. I never liked him really Well, I never disliked him either.

Speaker 1:

He just is corny, I just don't care, he's just like a corny dude?

Speaker 2:

Yeah Well, he's just not. You know well, go ahead, any of his old music.

Speaker 1:

Comes on, though Do not judge me for going in, he touches kids.

Speaker 2:

You can go in as much as you want. Man Michael Jackson comes on, I might sing a verse or two. He touched kids too, yeah.

Speaker 1:

I love Michael Jackson. You telling me started from the bottom comes on and you're not going to be like I actually don't like how that song aged, but I'm not going to lie, I loved it when it came out. But when I hear it now low key I'm like it does me. I'm like this is corny. Yeah, just same thing like YOLO. Yolo comes on and I'm like this is cringe.

Speaker 2:

I can't listen to it yeah. Hotline.

Speaker 1:

Bling. Hotline Bling was always mids. There's some songs, though I still like If Legend comes on, or like Hype Off, that's the only good song on Views. I think it is, if you're reading this, still a good album. I'll still give him that. But like his old old stuff, dude, like that's not even old old, that's like medium old. A lot of that stuff is like cringy. They started from the bottom in YOLO are fucking cringy dude.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, that's why I used to sing them, because they were cringe yeah because you're like this is fucking crazy. This is some dumb shit, it's like one of those things that I would like. I ironically said swag all the time growing up, because I thought it was swag, you know so dumb. And then I just started.

Speaker 1:

But then I just started saying it yeah, because you got used to saying it Just like these days I've been saying skibbity toilet, skibbity toilet dude and baby gronk. Baby gronk Riz Riz Ohio, riz me up, riz me up, daddy, sticking out my gap for the Rizler.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, all this brain rot garbage has been. I've been saying it ironically, but now I'm have you seen the Four Seasons baby?

Speaker 1:

Have you seen the? Have you seen the four seasons baby? You've seen this video where it's like a baby, like a literal, like it can't. It's got to be like a year and a half old maybe, and someone's holding them and the mom just goes. So who wants to go to the four seasons in orlando? And the baby goes me it's fucking crazy, dude with a full-grown man voice like no, but like the baby's, like me, like just says me, and I'm like dude at four seasons. Doesn't give this baby what other fucking wants?

Speaker 2:

give this baby free room for the rest of its life, um free promotion yeah, or you know, kill the baby, throw it in one of the four seasons dumpsters, yeah but yeah, it's just a baby fucking and I'm like, why am I watching this?

Speaker 1:

that's how I feel. I'm like I'm ruining myself exactly what you're doing.

Speaker 2:

Buddy just watched a video of a guy land on uh oh, I just opened up my twitter and this was what came is he dead? I'm assuming so did he?

Speaker 1:

just got through him he just got kebabbed.

Speaker 2:

Oh yes, he did so right up his pooper for those listening at home. Uh, imagine all those, those, uh cement poles on the side of the road that stop you from you know, riding over pedestrians. And then imagine a guy from a high rise jumping off and landing asshole first on one of these poles skewering him.

Speaker 1:

Do you think he came first though?

Speaker 2:

It was so quick. I think he would have come, had he lived long enough.

Speaker 1:

Do you think that he didn't get a post-mortem?

Speaker 2:

come, you can have a boner up to six hours after you die.

Speaker 1:

He might have gotten a post-mortem come in so he might have died, and then his dick was like fuck yeah, I don't know.

Speaker 2:

I don't know if he came. Rigamortis dude, yeah, dude, rizamortis bro fuck dude.

Speaker 1:

Jizz, jizz, jizz.

Speaker 2:

Mortis jizz just a lot of rigor, liver and algor liver and algor mortis. Dude jizz a mortis bro. When you bust so hard that you just fucking lock out, you know and die.

Speaker 1:

All of those things you said we should make like a Dungeons and Dragons show, but those are the main characters, the words you said, all the mortises.

Speaker 2:

Rigor liver and algor.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yeah, that'd be cool, cool. And there's three necromancers yeah, one of them's chaotic neutral, uh, one, or sorry, one's true neutral.

Speaker 2:

One's chaotic evil and one's lawful good. Yeah, and it's like an animated and they all just move around and one of them's always being a shithead real stinker, yeah, yeah they're always just raising up dead bodies to munch them and then the other two the other two are just like. Maybe we shouldn't do that.

Speaker 1:

Dude Adult Swim would pick this up.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and we call it mortis.

Speaker 1:

We call it living with the mortises, living with the morti Mortises. Unliving with the mortis. Yeah, unliving with the mortis, yeah, that's pretty good, we're getting closer.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, dude.

Speaker 1:

This is a pretty cool idea.

Speaker 2:

Don't take this fucking idea. Write this fucking down. Write this down. And if you do take this idea, all I want is credit. You don't even got to pay me, yeah, just.

Speaker 1:

Just let them know it was my idea, yeah.

Speaker 2:

Our idea Sorry.

Speaker 1:

I helped a little, but it't get any credit.

Speaker 2:

It was specifically Anthony Hand and Keegan Lawrence's idea in that order I don't want to be in on your guys's idea, then Good, because you're not Good. Don't want to be associated with such a catastrophic failure, although we did start talking about it because Zach was ignoring the podcast on his phone. Right, so Zach partial credit.

Speaker 1:

Nope, I don't want any. Yeah, you're right, fuck you, zach. Fuck you, zach, zach. Eat a fucking dick, dude. I don't want any and.

Speaker 2:

I don't want to be associated with your soon-to-be failure project. Will you voice one of the characters? No, will you be the lawful good one?

Speaker 1:

Yes, okay, you're back in Zach.

Speaker 2:

Norm's gonna be the neutral one, and then I'm going to be the real stinker.

Speaker 1:

We'll have Jacob draw it hey.

Speaker 2:

Jigamortis, stop dude. That's not lawful.

Speaker 1:

Good of you brother, hell, no, what's going on, guys? Stop, yeah, stop.

Speaker 2:

Please stop. Remember to never water on Sundays.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, you get fined for that. 't do that, that's bad.

Speaker 2:

Oh man, my dad definitely waters on sundays your dad told me that when he came over to change the he's the water.

Speaker 1:

God, though, dude, he told me. Basically he was like.

Speaker 2:

He was like man, I fucking, I worked my whole life to get a fucking lawn and like, and he was all like and you're gonna tell me I can't water it on sunday, he goes, I water it on sunday, just to prove a point.

Speaker 1:

I'll pay the fines I don't care, and he does yeah, he's been getting fined for years.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, my mom's like can we? You know we could save money if you just?

Speaker 1:

and he's like I don't care, I'm dying.

Speaker 2:

It's the principle he just always wanted a grass yard, and by damn he has one yeah he told me that whole, that whole origin story too.

Speaker 1:

He was like we never had a yard growing up and it's all I ever wanted and now he's like and now I had a yard growing up and, like being a kid of a parent who has a yard sucks yeah, you got to take because yeah you just wake up on saturday and you they'd be like, all right, we're fucking pulling weeds and mowing the lawn and falling I'm like I don't and weed whacking and I'm like I don't want to do any of this shit, but they're like it's going to take your old fucking saturday, your whole fucking saturday literally yeah, from like seven in the morning to seven at night.

Speaker 1:

You're just just out on the lawn fucking.

Speaker 2:

I hate it but, like I'm grateful for those times as well.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, but in Florida, dude, our lawn was so big yeah, like bigger than any lawn I've seen in Vegas by like five times, I'd imagine. But that's just because, no, it's just because there's so much fucking grass out there.

Speaker 2:

That's what everything's built on is grass and sinkholes yeah, sinkholes and we had a basement though that shit was pretty sick.

Speaker 1:

We were on the hills, and alligators there were alligators, yeah, yeah. Snakes swamp people, tornadoes, spiders, hurricanes I don't know about tornadoes.

Speaker 2:

Are there tornadoes? Hurricanes though hurricanes, hurricanes that's what I said.

Speaker 1:

I said hurricanes. I also said tornadoes.

Speaker 2:

Guess what a byproduct of a hurricane is? Try that no tornado. I don't think that's right. Hurricane, stay hurricanes check it out?

Speaker 1:

I don't. I don't. Hurricanes die when they stop getting water, they don't turn into a tornado I think it's okay.

Speaker 2:

It can happen. I don't think it does. Ask Jeeves that shit.

Speaker 1:

Ask Jeeves. Is Ask Jeeves still around?

Speaker 2:

If I go to, AskJeevescom.

Speaker 1:

right now it doesn't come up.

Speaker 2:

No, I think Ask got bought out by Bing. It's just Askcom yeah but it is still Ask.

Speaker 1:

That's what I said.

Speaker 2:

What was the question? Do hurricanes turn into tornadoes? That's the question right Do tornadoes occur due to a hurricane. For sure is my, that's a good one yeah. Like a byproduct of like mass wind fluctuation Come on, I'm not crazy here.

Speaker 1:

Well, the big thing about tornadoes is temperamental differences. Dude. The links on Ask are horrendous.

Speaker 2:

Well, yeah, you're using a search engine from 1984. I'm over it.

Speaker 1:

An answer didn't even come up. Dude Should have Googled it. Google has AI built into their shit now, dude, that shit's crazy dude, we're gonna die, we're gonna die, that's it. Hey, everyone, we're gonna die.

Speaker 2:

Zach is not satisfied with your lackluster answer of ask is bad.

Speaker 1:

Ask is bad, dude. Ask is bad. Ask is bad. Check it guys. Here we go. Ask is dab.

Speaker 2:

Hurricane and tropical storms can produce tornadoes.

Speaker 1:

Boom Period- Good job Zach.

Speaker 2:

That's right. Think about those mass wind fluctuations, gentlemen. Come on, even the dumbest guy on the podcast knew that. You fucking bitches, you bitches, you fucking bitches. You ever seen the movie the Day After Tomorrow? You know they're making a new Twister. No, I'm going to watch it tomorrow. Yeah, twisters.

Speaker 1:

Twisters. And it's a bunch of tornadoes, that's when you fuck twin sisters at the same time. You said I just got a. Twister. Just got a Twister.

Speaker 2:

You know I'm in the eye of the storm, baby. You know, I watched some porn of two twin sisters having sex.

Speaker 1:

Wait like actually.

Speaker 2:

Were they making out with each other?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, that's kind of hot, but like gross it's gross, but like that's so hot, I was like oh, no, the problem is they're both hot right. So like, obviously you like looking at it. Hey, can you send a link? Yeah, Dude, send the link.

Speaker 2:

God dude, I'd only be able to think about how incest is illegal.

Speaker 1:

No, you weren't.

Speaker 2:

Disgusting. That's the waffle good for you.

Speaker 1:

No see, I feel like dude. You're telling me if you were young single Zach and two really hot twin sisters came up to you and were like hey, we want to fuck you. You're going to say no because you're like this is illegal. There's no way you say no, yeah, call the cops on them immediately hello officers. There's two twin sisters here who want to have sex with me.

Speaker 2:

That they are hot. Why are you asking? He's like I'll be right down. No, no, I'm not gonna do it.

Speaker 1:

You need to get down here and then the officer's like all right, you can go, we have business to take care of. And then he fucks the two twins in his cop car and then takes him to jail only if they touch each other yes, yeah, so yeah, what if they don't touch each other?

Speaker 2:

What if you're just having sex with both of them? Yeah, what if one's?

Speaker 1:

sitting on your face and one's sitting on your dick and they don't touch each other and they're facing opposite directions.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, Different scenario. I'm not going to participate Because the answer is yes, the answer is yes, for the first one too, if you're not fucking two twin sisters.

Speaker 1:

You're crazy.

Speaker 2:

I would do it, even if they're ugly.

Speaker 1:

Just to say I had sex with twins Like kind of yeah, yeah, the bar is lower. Yeah, dude for sure.

Speaker 2:

You don't got to be a 10. You just got to be like a solid five. Yeah, dude, if you just walk to someone and you go dude, I fucked're getting an up top and you'll be like how hot they were.

Speaker 1:

And you'll be like, yeah, they're all right. And they'll be like, ah, it doesn't fucking matter, yeah, yeah you, you yeah yeah, for sure that's a w. If you have sex with twin sisters, you win. Like it's just then the I mean for the twin sisters and it's just weird for them that's their problem to figure out yeah, but but like who cares? Yep not me Nasty. Nasty.

Speaker 2:

Nasty. No, thank you, I don't want to participate in any crimes.

Speaker 1:

So you're telling me Mano has a twin sister.

Speaker 2:

I've got a record to uphold here. I'm going to go check for poo-poo downstairs.

Speaker 1:

Well, we can call it, we're at an hour. Oh yeah, no, an hour, we're at 50 minutes, dude. So you're going to check with five minutes left, 52. Alright, let's just call it.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, dude, what does your shirt say, dumb bitch?

Speaker 1:

drinks water.

Speaker 2:

Dumb bitch thinks hurricanes cause tornadoes. This is a tasteful weed shirt here, gentlemen just to be clear with you.

Speaker 1:

Look at the back here.

Speaker 2:

Photosynthesis is fun and it's got a very cool not just a pot leaf, but like a cool plant. That's like a cannabis plant on the back.

Speaker 1:

And it's got some cool information on there. Yeah, yeah, talking about photosynthesis.

Speaker 2:

Tell me your favorite thing about weed Getting high baby yeah, why.

Speaker 1:

Well, never even thought about it.

Speaker 2:

He's a fake pothead. That's a really good question I could tell you why I like getting high. Why and that might help you come up with an answer I like it because, uh, it turns my brain off and I don't have to think. I usually do a lot of thinking and not all my thoughts are very good, so when I smoke weed, it makes me dumb.

Speaker 2:

I like I like making music on it because it's actually it's for a similar reason to that. It's, uh, it turns off that like logical part of your brain for just a little bit and it's like I can still sit there and like problem solve and everything, but like it's almost like I'm not having. Uh, it almost blocks out like the, the eyes looking over my shoulders, so to speak, sitting there always thinking are people going to like this? Is this cool enough for people to want to enjoy? Sometimes you just got to make some shit, just to make some shit. There you go, do drugs, kids. Why didn't you ask me? You don't like smoking weed?

Speaker 1:

Why do you like smoking weed? Mainly to go to to sleep. But if it's not to go to sleep, um, I like to drive my vehicle, because you know, I never know what's gonna happen I actually am the safest driver in the world. When I'm high, I can see that exactly the speed limit. It's insane.

Speaker 2:

No, I don't like to drive, but I feel like I'm fast I mainly like to do and the safest driver in the world.

Speaker 1:

When I'm high, I can see that I go exactly the speed limit. It's insane. No, I don't like to drive and I feel like I'm fast.

Speaker 2:

I mainly like to do it to sleep. Yeah, I don't want to sleep.

Speaker 1:

I don't like to do it to sleep, because then I never remember my dreams.

Speaker 2:

And I have cool dreams sometimes. All right, do drugs.

Speaker 1:

Drop out of school. Do drugs.

Speaker 2:

Drink nice rum, watch tires.

Speaker 1:

School's pointless Watch tires. Steal your girlfriend's Netflix account. And be ready Ex-girlfriends, change everything and then fuck two hot twin sisters, or even if they're not.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, or even if they're sisters.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, maybe Keegan will post a link in the description. Maybe they're sisters. Yeah, maybe Keegan will post a link.

Speaker 2:

Maybe they're brothers, maybe you're fucking twin brothers and you just tell everyone that you had sex with twins.

Speaker 1:

Incest is a crime. Don't do it, no only on Tuesdays. Outro Music.