Please Drink Responsibly

Ep. 130 | Barrel Secrets

You Got Male Season 2

Ask us anything, we know it all!

Ever wondered how a simple game of Mario Party could set the stage for a whiskey-filled celebration? Join us as we kick off Zach's birthday bash with some playful banter and plans for an epic gaming session. From there, we shift our focus to the rich, complex world of bourbon whiskey, diving into a new release from Savage and Cook. We unpack the stringent standards of Bottled and Bond, share fond (and not-so-fond) memories of past bourbon tastings, and celebrate Savage and Cook's first proprietary mash featuring the rare heirloom howling mob corn.

Next, prepare to sip along as we explore an exclusive bourbon experience that's truly one for the books. Corey's in Las Vegas has managed to secure two distinct bourbon blends, and we're giving you the inside scoop on these limited treasures. We also take a flavorful detour into other exclusive barrel selections, like High West bourbons finished in Cabernet and rum casks. Whether you're a seasoned aficionado or a curious newcomer, you'll appreciate our insights into the aging process, barrel impacts, and the sheer joy of discovering and sharing unique spirits with friends.

Finally, brace yourself for a rollercoaster of anecdotes, from mischievous pets to culinary adventures. Picture a delightful family dinner with smoked brisket, followed by a decadent meal at Bazaar Meats, where dishes like foie gras cotton candy steal the show. We'll also chat about golf club fittings, streaming binges, and even some unfiltered banter that touches on controversial topics. Balancing humor with serious discussions, this episode promises a little something for everyone, wrapped up in a bow of laughter and camaraderie.

We know more than Google and Musk combined, go ahead and send your questions to:
YouGotMalePod@gmail.com

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Speaker 1:

She doesn't have a vacation, but she did suck your dick while she was there. She's still there.

Speaker 2:

Welcome to you. Got Mail the manliest podcast on the internet that was really good man, that was really good.

Speaker 1:

She's still trying to suck you off, something like that. Hey-oh, bing-bong maggots.

Speaker 2:

Bing-bong.

Speaker 1:

Welcome to you. Got Mail, the manliest podcast on the internet. You're kicking back with Keegan Norman, zach Guys, everyone go say happy birthday to Zach, because it happened last Wednesday. You missed it.

Speaker 2:

You guys suck. You're bad fans.

Speaker 1:

But we're recording this the day before. Zach's birthday Woo.

Speaker 3:

How old you, turning bud 27.

Speaker 1:

27. Yeah, you're not there yet I'm 29. You're still a young kid. 29? Yeah, you're still just a little boy, a little boy. A little boy that can be touched by older men A little boy.

Speaker 3:

And then there's still a little boy that can be touched by older men. A little boy. Do a poopy in your pants, little boy. Are you doing anything for your birthday, zach, zach, you want some.

Speaker 1:

What are we doing tonight? Are we doing a night after the pod for Zach's birthday? Are you just playing some video games? Maybe Chilling.

Speaker 3:

I think my brother wanted to come over and play a like Mario Party or something.

Speaker 2:

So if you guys want to play, Mario Party, then we can.

Speaker 1:

Do you want us to play Mario?

Speaker 3:

Party. Yes, the birthday boys.

Speaker 1:

Well then, I want to do that. Yeah, Fuck. Yeah, dude, I got I a lot to talk about on this episode that I think you guys are only going to be interested in half of it. We're going to talk about all of it, and the thing that you guys are interested in is what's in this bottle? Zach, not so much Keegan, probably a decent amount. So I brought the alcohol this week and I brought a bourbon whiskey, I believe made in California. This is what the gentleman told me is correct. So this is Savage and Cook and it is their first bourbon bottle and bond in their rickhouse, their specific distillery. But we've tried their bourbon before.

Speaker 3:

Norm what's Bottled and Bond. So Bottled and Bond is like.

Speaker 1:

it's almost like a set of rules that the government has in place, kind of like when it comes to wine like DOG or GOCG, you know all that shit. So the government puts in place some stricter rules for bourbon. If you want to call a bottle and bond, it has to follow certain guidelines and it kind of just means that the bourbon has been taken extra special care of in some way and you know it's going to be of pretty good quality when it's a bottle and bond.

Speaker 1:

So we've had this bourbon before, but it's not this bourbon, because, if you guys remember that, burning chair whiskey I brought in a long time ago that half the bottle spilled in the back of my car. Is that a pop?

Speaker 3:

bubble yeah, I'm not editing. No, it's Zach's week. No, it's my week.

Speaker 1:

Zach was the one who forgot this week.

Speaker 3:

All right, well, we'll see how creative I feel. Don't do the thought bubble.

Speaker 1:

And then it'll be me talking about the bottle that's from my car, yeah, but so this is. This is by Dave Finney, who's the guy that started a bunch of vineyards uh, including the prisoner wine and uh made the a lot of the orange swift stuff, um and like, has done all the those wines and and that was the bourbon we tasted. So originally, though, that bourbon we tasted was him getting started with bourbon, but he was buying up other places' bourbons and he was finishing them in the barrels he wanted to finish them in and then blending them himself.

Speaker 2:

So it wasn't their mash.

Speaker 1:

This is their first mash that they've been working on for years, but the bourbon's finally ready, so they're putting it out. So that's why the bottle looks different. They thought about doing like the same because the other bottles were like short and stout, kind of shaped a little different. Yeah, they wanted to make sure they had their own look for their own mash build and made it unique, because I believe even the other one was technically like from Savage and Cook, but like you didn't even see it on the bottle anywhere, like it was kind of like. So this is like the nice gentleman over at Corey's Best Ball Shop in Vegas. Go visit Corey's. Can't talk about them enough. There's a really cool guy over there. He's always got the knowledge. For me, all the guys who work over there seem to be pretty cool. But this is is a new fucking every, because he saw me just looking through a bunch of stuff and he's like you have any questions? And I was like I don't know what is all all of this?

Speaker 1:

because there's like four bottles I was looking at um so I bought that. He let me taste basically all four of the bottles I was looking at. But I bought the, the howling mob bourbon whiskey, which is a variation of their mash um, where they had another one called the bloody butcher, which way cooler name in my opinion, but this one had the cooler taste right.

Speaker 1:

So the bloody butcher kind of tasted like a really really good, like, like everyday sipping bourbon like it kind of, and so they actually use no rye in either their mash builds. But the other one even felt like there was like a little bit of rye, like it kind of finished with that little burn that you like in whiskey, uh, but it had a very round finish, uh, super easy to drink. And then I tried this one and this one I was like this is so interesting, there's like and it's so. Apparently it's because they use this heirloom howling mob corn which apparently doesn't get grown very much because it doesn't sell well for corn growers, like it's not the bright yellow corn that they sell to supermarkets yeah, it's like this very dark purple.

Speaker 1:

That's kind of why the color is so dark. You tell me it's like a dark purple, almost bluish. Like corn that like people don't really grow. But he found a farmer that was willing to like, source him the corn, like they'll grow it, basically just for the bourbon and so, uh, so they do it with, like, it's mostly the corn, I want to say he told me it was like upper 80 percent and then they finish the rest of the mash bill with malted barley. It's actually haunted still and so that's all the mash bill. That's this. It's just corn and malted barley and it's got a really unique taste with the, the corn that they use in it. So, and apparently the this, this distillery that this guy bought is like an old navy fucking warehouse up near san francisco or something like that, and apparently they still use a lot of like the technology that was left in the warehouse.

Speaker 1:

Like he's telling me to move around barrels. They have like these giant metal hooks and chains that were meant to pull in ships that they used to like drag the barrel stacks across the floor and shit he said he hasn't been in the distillery himself, but another gentleman who worked at cory's visited it. Uh, before they got in these bottles because these are actually special edition bottles to celebrate their very first release of the bourbon- the other ones even have a different label.

Speaker 1:

It's just a white paper that's printed and slapped on. But this, you can even feel it. It's like literally a fabric that they painted on and put on the bottle.

Speaker 3:

I was looking at the label before you walked in, so yeah, the other bottles won't even have this.

Speaker 1:

They'll just have a label like this, but it's all white and it's just put on the front. So yeah, 100%, because it's really good.

Speaker 2:

And the bottle was only $80, $79.99.

Speaker 1:

So it's not too bad, uh, for something super cool. Um, uh, the other thing he was telling me was what was I about to say? I lost my train of thought. Um, I did the navy thing that the bottle, um, now I'm blanking. I had one other thing to say I forgot. But yeah, so this is really good stuff. I'll pop it open, we can start sipping it, and then I'll tell you about the other stuff I tried while I was there. I'll probably keep this bottle, though I don't have any plans on. I'll probably keep this bottle for a long time, maybe turn it into a lamp, who knows, because it's actually a really nice shaped bottle too that we could put other stuff in.

Speaker 2:

It feels good in my hand. It's just a pretty solid bottle.

Speaker 1:

You'll notice just off the smell it has a really unique smell. That's almost like, it's almost like vegetal in a way, but it's got some pretty cool notes. But yeah, he was saying, some other gentleman at the bottle shop got a visit where it's made and he said it was like fucking crazy, like he's blown away Like Wonka's factory.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, kind of Dude, he said. They even dragged in a like I don't know how big it is.

Speaker 1:

He said they even dragged in. I don't know how big it is, but he said they cut a hole in the wall of the factory to drag in a retired Navy ship to house their cafe for the distillery.

Speaker 2:

So they have like I was like that ship, he was like dude it sounds so.

Speaker 1:

He's like I have to go and I was like I have to go now. This sounds fucking cool as fuck. Is that San Diego?

Speaker 2:

Somewhere up by.

Speaker 1:

San Francisco I believe you said somewhere in. You could probably say what's it called Mare? Island, california, m-a-r-e.

Speaker 3:

Like the lemon. Oh, that's the other thing I was going to say, so they only made 31 barrels of this.

Speaker 1:

And then they made the other one. They made more. They made something like 68 barrels, maybe 69 barrels of the other one. And then Vegas apparently got like he said Vegas got something like 40 cases in whole of this and maybe like 80 cases of the other. He says Corey's owns all 40 cases of this. You can only buy this at Corey's in Vegas. You will not find it anywhere else.

Speaker 2:

He said we bought all of them.

Speaker 1:

So they have a lot of this, but they had all of it in Vegas, so Corey's is the only place you can buy this. I think the other blend you might find so the Bloody Glacier you might find elsewhere.

Speaker 1:

Even this bottle you might find elsewhere. But he said they bought all of this so you can only get this at Corey's. So that was super cool. That was the other thing. I was like dude, dude, that's fucking crazy. Yeah, um, and then the. The other barrels are obviously elsewhere in the, in the united states, probably um, but uh, but yeah, it's super cool, it's super good. I'm excited for you guys to try this um, because I tried it and immediately I was like oh yeah, this is unique and different and it tastes good, like I love the smell of it already. Yeah, yeah, that's fucking good, dude. It's like a little sweet up front Got a little kick in the back. Very back Goes down pretty smooth. Yeah, that's pretty good stuff, yeah that's pretty good stuff.

Speaker 3:

That's pretty good stuff.

Speaker 1:

I like that. So, yeah, super cool to talk to this guy, him showing me that, like I said, the other version of this was really good version of this was really good. The other two bottles I was looking at was Corey's did a barrel select of High West, which is another bourbon company From Texas. They had two different ones of that that Corey selected the finish of. They selected the finish of one to be in a Cabernet barrel and the finish of another to be in a rum cask. That's the one you would have liked. Yeah, um, and I tried it and it was good. Uh, it was sweet, it tasted like coconut almost in a really cool way, like it wasn't a lot of coconut, yeah, like kind of finished toasted coconutty, um, and that was really good. And the Cabernet was like a little spicy, almost like black peppery, and it had some really cool notes on it. And both those bottles I think, were only like those might have only been like $60. And those you can actually only get at Corey's because it's their select.

Speaker 3:

You don't know the answer to this. What?

Speaker 2:

do they?

Speaker 3:

age rum in usually Like what kind of oak?

Speaker 2:

It's usually American.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, it's used bourbon barrels for the most part. They can use whatever they want. Some places use like French, like Ronza Kappa, they use like French limousine, but most like Appleton Estate and Bacardi and blah, blah, blah, blah. If they have an aged rum, which Bacardi does, it's for the most part old bourbon barrels, so aging it was bourbon. Yeah, so it's like aging a bourbon in a barrel. That's already aged bourbon, but then also aged rum.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and they usually just put it in there. So maybe they leave it in for a couple of months and they bottle it.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, I don't know how long it takes to own it yeah.

Speaker 1:

I think it just depends on what you want. You might leave it in for three months, you might leave it in for a year.

Speaker 3:

Some people do it for a couple of years. This has a really dark color which makes me think.

Speaker 2:

I mean, yeah, it is the corn right yeah.

Speaker 3:

Do you know how long it was aged? I do not. Minimum of three years. If there's no age statement, they usually just infer that that's three years.

Speaker 1:

But that's such a dark color for only three years, Like I said the dude was telling me that the corn is a really dark color, so I have a feeling it has to do with that. But yeah, I think there's pretty good stuff for being its first, first bottling of uh distillery, uh distillery.

Speaker 2:

Keep your eye on the court, yeah, for sure.

Speaker 1:

So uh good stuff, yeah, and if this is only 80 bucks, then I'm gonna assume their regular stuff is probably gonna be well. Yeah, like $60, somewhere in there, but I can't imagine it being more than $55. I looked it up when I was looking it up.

Speaker 3:

Oh, you did so it was $45?. Yeah, this one's $95 online.

Speaker 1:

Oh yeah, corey's had it for $79.99, I believe, yeah, yeah, well, like I change, like I said, corey has all of it, we'll all be in Vegas, so they probably could have been like whatever the fuck you want.

Speaker 3:

Corey's a cool place for cool people, they don't do that kind of shit really. Yeah, so.

Speaker 1:

I was like yeah, this got me excited.

Speaker 3:

This is cool stuff.

Speaker 1:

Like I said, shout out to the gentleman at Corey's who taught me all of this information and 90, all of this information.

Speaker 3:

And $90 for this quality.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, solid Good stuff, Solid. Yeah. This is definitely a really nice sipper. Good sip on this all night. Put a little ice in it, put a little water in it.

Speaker 3:

This is something I'd want to sip on. If I'm playing poker with the guys around the table yeah, I know, maybe we can go take a cigar break. Yeah, guys around the table.

Speaker 1:

Maybe we go take a cigar break. Yeah, you know, it's just been chilling on a big rock. Maybe it's like getting a little obviously not now, but like later on it gets a little chilly outside. You don't have to put on a hoodie. Maybe you go sit outside and drink a little bit of this.

Speaker 3:

Maybe you had a really tough day. You just come home from work after getting your ass kicked all day. You just sit by the fireplace and warm your little piggies right by the fire and pour yourself a nice, pour a nice couple fingers of this.

Speaker 1:

Savage. I like describing whiskey pours as fingers. Yeah, makes me feel like a gentleman.

Speaker 3:

It makes me feel old-timey, for sure, because that's how they used to measure things.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, let me get a couple things.

Speaker 3:

Let me get two fingers and then I get a full arm feel frisky. That's usually like if you read like um, what's the bartending book?

Speaker 1:

the bartending book uh, I know you're talking about, but I don't know why can't you think of the guy?

Speaker 2:

bartending for dummies?

Speaker 3:

no, this is dude yeah, that book's so good. But anyway, if you read a lot of the, I can only think of John Taffer. For some reason I can't read that again.

Speaker 1:

Not John.

Speaker 3:

Taffer. It's not John Taffer, oh my goodness, Whatever, it'll come to me If you read old-fashioned bartending books like the Bartender's Manifesto and things like that. They measure pours by really fucking weird measurements, like really weird units. They'll be like oh pour in a finger of this, pour in a pony of this, pour in one couple of this, and I'm like what the fuck is that? One pony lemon juice.

Speaker 2:

What is a pony? What's a pony Then?

Speaker 3:

you gotta look up a translation. You're like what's a pony? And they're like what's a pony.

Speaker 2:

And they're like it's like two ounces.

Speaker 3:

They're like small horse, you're like wrong.

Speaker 2:

No, it's a measurement One small horse worth of lemon juice.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, I'm going to have to send a picture of this to my GM. This bottle just looked good, yeah, so it was like a semen time. Yeah, man, we've been drinking some cool stuff. I'm very grateful for my job just because I do get to try so many cool, expensive, rare things.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, our general manager is the shit dude that I would never, ever try. It's like the coolest stuff. We got Red Best 27 in a port wine cast yesterday which we can't try until we sell it. But oh, I'm not going to sell it For once. I have like a reason to sell $150 shot, yeah, and then, and then we got three of the Heritage Collection out of Buffalo Trace Distilleries, which is the Weller, the Stag and the Sazerac.

Speaker 3:

The.

Speaker 2:

Thomas.

Speaker 1:

Sazerac though, because apparently there's also the regular Sazerac. So we have like the Thomas H Hardy Sazerac, and then there's also the regular Sazerac. What so? We have like the.

Speaker 2:

Tom H.

Speaker 1:

Hardy Sazerac, and then there's also just Sazerac, and I guess they're different. Huh, yeah, but this is the one based on a guy who bought the Sazerac coffee shop in New Orleans.

Speaker 3:

And worked with Mr Patience to create the Sazerac cocktail. So that makes me really want to have a $60 Sazerac. Yeah, because all I can think of is this is what it should be made with I mean, yeah, Sazerac's not, you don't change the bourbon too much.

Speaker 1:

No, it's still a very bourbon-forward cocktail.

Speaker 3:

for sure I wouldn't feel too bad adding some batches of payshows and you know what's the most you think you would go out and spend on a cocktail.

Speaker 1:

On a cocktail, yeah Say, you're out, you're not really worried about money, you want to have a good time. And then you've got some crazy cocktail in the middle and you're like this sounds delicious. What's like the wherever you see the price. You're like this sounds delicious. What's like the wherever you see the price. You're like this is, I'm not going to eat it.

Speaker 3:

I'd probably like 25 bucks yeah.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 3:

Like I could see myself spending maybe like 32.

Speaker 1:

It depends Because in my head, I think if I saw 35, I'd be like no, not worth it. Yeah, but I think if it was, below 35, I might be like no, not worth it, yeah. But I think if it was below $35, I might be like well.

Speaker 3:

I'll try. Yeah, yeah, like how much I pay at Velveteen. I think that's like $18.

Speaker 1:

Velveteen cocktails are only like $18.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, but that's expensive for a cocktail, but also in Vegas you go on a strip. You can pay like $22 for just an old-fashioned fashioned because you're at fucking this strip yeah but their cocktails are fantastic and they always do crazy shit.

Speaker 1:

They put in $25 worth of work to velveteen cocktails 100% yeah, but they only charge $18.

Speaker 3:

I also feel like if I were to spend a dumb amount of money on a cocktail like, let's say, somebody made a cocktail that was $80, it's going to be bullshit, it's just going to be gold flakes and top shelf liquor for no reason and they're going to just be like this is an expensive cocktail to be an expensive cocktail.

Speaker 2:

If you get a $25 cocktail, they're like we know this is pricey for a cocktail, but we're using some good shit and it's gonna be, it's gonna be worth it for sure, maybe 30, I don't know.

Speaker 1:

I think that, like I said, if I saw 30, 32, I could maybe be like, if it looked right, I was like, yeah, this has great ingredients. It sounds like it would be made well you'd have to sell me a little bit.

Speaker 3:

yeah, I, yeah, I would definitely ask. I would sit down with this $32 cocktail. But if all the answers were?

Speaker 1:

correct, I'd be like okay, let's do it.

Speaker 3:

We clarified it. I'd be like get fun, Get out of here.

Speaker 1:

You need a clarified milk punch.

Speaker 3:

I do want to clarify a cocktail for the Nora's Pump. You know how. We have St Greer on tap. Just replace that with a clarified jungle bird or paper plane or something That'd be so cool.

Speaker 2:

And it's all the rage right now. Clarifying takes no skill.

Speaker 3:

Just a little bit of prep work and we batch the whole thing. That would save us time and it'd be popular.

Speaker 2:

I had some people coming in today. Did she poop? She did On the carpet?

Speaker 3:

Okay, she pooped on my carpet the other day, hell yeah, dude, it was a wet shit too. Yeah, I'll fucking sumo-plex that bitch. Yeah, bro, let them know, dude, my dog be pissing me off, but also she's like a good girl and like also she'd be pissing me off. But she knows when I'm like fuck you dog. How dare you know my weaknesses and vulnerabilities and try to comfort me and make me feel better.

Speaker 3:

You know I'm weak to the physical touch, Bro. She literally just like lay on my head, Like cover my entire face and body she's trying to take you out, dude, that's fine, she knows what. I want.

Speaker 1:

No today, oh what?

Speaker 3:

I'm going to date my dog.

Speaker 1:

No, your dog wants you to.

Speaker 3:

She's only a year old.

Speaker 1:

That's 21 dog years. Oh then, you're good, she can have a drink.

Speaker 3:

No, I'm sorry, it is seven. So it's the first year of a dog's life is like the first 21 years of a human's life, and then it's three years after that, per year so yeah, it's not seven anymore. I'm confused so imagine well, think about it like they do all their growing, for the most part in the first year, right yeah so like accelerated, and then after that they don't grow as much, but they are still aging faster.

Speaker 3:

So it's like three years, yeah, each I get that, yeah, but like your whole life, it's been told seven and now. So it's like three years each. I get that, but your whole life, it's been told seven.

Speaker 2:

And now it's different.

Speaker 3:

I can dig that. I can dig 21. 21's cool to me. Speaking of 21, zach, you're 100. What are you doing? Are you doing anything for your birthday? Did you do anything? You got plans? You getting gifts? Tell us about you, man, this is your episode, other than the first three minutes. We might actually go back to Norm if you answer. I don't think that I really had any plans. I just had dinner with my family. How?

Speaker 1:

was it? What did you eat?

Speaker 3:

Dude, my dad smoked a brisket because he was like what do you want to eat? I was like, let me get a brisket. I had briskets, mashed potatoes, broccoli, like when we get a brisket, so had briskets mashed potatoes, broccoli little rolls actions. My makeup Brussels sprouts, Uh no.

Speaker 1:

I want to fucking clear the other night and had some Brussels sprouts.

Speaker 3:

Oh, I like I like when your mom makes salmon and when she makes Brussels sprouts. Yeah, those are two things that I never had in my house growing up. So when I had it in your house, those are two things that I never had in my house growing up. So when I had them in your house I was like, oh shit, these are pretty good too.

Speaker 2:

Yeah salmon.

Speaker 3:

Hershey does her salmon just with a fuck ton of garlic salt, Bakes it on the fucking grill yeah man Throws it in a tin foil.

Speaker 2:

I'm okay with that Soak ass.

Speaker 3:

But yeah, this is it, this is the main event. Honestly, when people ask me what I want to do for my birthday, I was just like whatever I want. And I was like and what I want is pretty much nothing. I don't want to go anywhere or do anything, I just want to work on music and play games and enjoy my life.

Speaker 1:

Are you off?

Speaker 3:

tomorrow no Is there a change you're off tomorrow. I don't know. I talked a little bit with Alon and I was like, hey, so definitely Campos is off tomorrow, I believe.

Speaker 1:

Wait why it's not his birthday.

Speaker 2:

He worked on Sunday and Sunday.

Speaker 3:

there was only one busser that was necessary, so me and the other guy.

Speaker 1:

You went out to a nice dinner Sunday, though, yeah.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, exactly, so I did go to Bazaar.

Speaker 1:

Meats, which was fun.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, that looked pretty sick. Did they have Bazaar?

Speaker 2:

Meats. They did. What are some Bazaar Meats I've never heard of this place.

Speaker 1:

Dude, it's supposed to be Prey Fire. I've heard of it, I've never been there.

Speaker 3:

Well, I think it's mostly centered on on the dishes themselves and the way that they present them. They have a couple different. Foie gras, cotton candy.

Speaker 1:

Dude, that was the best I know.

Speaker 3:

you're a sucker for foie gras, dude, that was the best. So they do it like terrine style, where they put a foie gras terrine on a stick and they make house-made corn nuts.

Speaker 2:

And then they mix it into the terrine.

Speaker 3:

So the terrine itself has like a salty crunch to it which is fucking good. And then they swirl it in cotton candy and so it comes out and you got like a nice pie where you got cotton candy and some foie gras, terrine and corn nuts delicious, they did like a smoked camon with a it was like a thick slice of like camon basically, and like similar to prosciutto, I guess, if I had to, but uh nice thicker slice of it and they smoked it just a little bit and then they put uh caviar and gold flakes on the top.

Speaker 3:

That shit was gas um they did, uh, we did a steak. They do like a reverse sear on their steak, so so, they're the only open fire pit cooking steaks in Las Vegas. Did they buy the? Because the steakhouse in. Circus. Circus also has an open fire pit cooking steaks.

Speaker 2:

I know you said the same thing when I went. I don't know.

Speaker 3:

I think they might be a little different or they might have closed. That's a good possibility too. But yeah, they do a nice big open pit and they have like an elevated like, um like resting area for the steak. So basically they cook it way up above the fire pit so that it like sort of starts cooking the inside and stuff like that, and then at the last moment before it's ready, they throw it down on the bottom, where it's like getting hit by the fire.

Speaker 3:

So it's like you're getting like a lot of that like caramelization on the outside, because it's all the fat has like rendered down and sort of coated the outside of the steak and then they caramelize it with the flame. You know, just give it like a good one or two minutes on each side to finish it off. So it gives it a nice sear, Nice little bit of charcoal sort of taste, but really fucking good.

Speaker 3:

They do a bunch of different cuts of meat to where they have a Japanese A5 Wagyu that they cook table side for you. They cook table side for you yeah, it is Japanese. You just gotta watch, you just gotta watch and then they eat it in front of you and you're like, and they're like, shut up, sit in the corner.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, but they put a side.

Speaker 3:

So they do that, but they cook it table side next to you on like a searing hot stone. That's like a thin stone or whatever.

Speaker 1:

That's apparently like a traditional method or whatever, but we did that in Japan. Actually, we had like a steak dinner where you cooked it yourself, they like, sliced it for you and then brought it out, and then you put it on this little scalding hot thin stone that's in front of you and you cooked it to what you wanted, which was fire.

Speaker 3:

But no, everything there was like really really well done, so it was pretty cool.

Speaker 1:

We didn't get it medium rare.

Speaker 3:

No, we did get it medium rare.

Speaker 1:

You have to, or else you'll kill yourself.

Speaker 2:

You said well done, no I didn't hear, I didn't hear well done.

Speaker 1:

So I gave you a.

Speaker 3:

You said everything is well done.

Speaker 1:

Oh, oh, now I get it. Now I'm on the same page. Give me that Good one.

Speaker 2:

Keith, I don't want it anymore. No, I'm on board now. Come on. Yeah, you do. You kind of want it. Come on, man.

Speaker 3:

I can't be taking it back until they fuck me over. Dude, I gotta put down man. Hey, dude, look at it. Come on, you know weak to that smooth food.

Speaker 1:

It was delicious and of course man will pay for it all. No, what?

Speaker 3:

Return her.

Speaker 1:

Take her to a used fiance store.

Speaker 2:

That's right, Because you know, she's not in her restaurant job anymore.

Speaker 3:

And so I told her like hey, when you first transition into this job and shit, you know like I'm going to try and be taking on more of the more of the expenditures because, uh, not for my birthday, bitch what no?

Speaker 3:

for my birthday too I want to go someplace super nice, and so I took her someplace super nice and that's what I wanted to do for my birthday. I just wanted to go have a really nice dinner. What was your bill for my lady? Um, we got kind of hooked up a little bit because, uh, we knew one of the servers that has come into our restaurant a couple times and I've also like seen him at a couple like social events, like through like co-workers and stuff like that.

Speaker 3:

So he ended up coming out to like 240, which was like two cocktails and two tasting menus he charged us for, like the Las Vegas weekly restaurant, whatever hundred dollar tasting menu, but he gave us more food than was on that menu, for sure, you know. So it was nice. He kind of hooked it up a little bit. Gave us some c than was on that menu, for sure, you know. So it was nice. He kind of hooked it up a little bit. Gave us some kava when we first got there, first time trying kava.

Speaker 3:

I've had kava once I mean, it's sparkling wine, but still all sparkling wine is delicious to me. I think, actually, I have decided that if somebody was just like you get to choose one spirit to drink for like the rest of your life, or like one like alcoholic beverage to drink for the rest of your life I'm going with champagne, yeah, champagne I like it, dude, it's just it's so fun to drink to me you get to have mimosas.

Speaker 2:

Yep the bubbles you get to have uh, pretty much actually just mimosas they make it from a range of like really dry to really sweet.

Speaker 3:

So there's something.

Speaker 1:

You can have the Aperol spritzes without the Aperol.

Speaker 3:

Right, yep, so mimosas yeah.

Speaker 1:

I would definitely choose bourbon, though. Well, no, that's a lie, I would choose rye Whiskey.

Speaker 3:

Well, you could just choose whiskey and I'll just choose whiskey and I get all of it yeah that's a lot, it's so much, because then I could just use wine.

Speaker 2:

You don't just do. I get japanese. You have to pick an ethnicity. So if you say american whiskey, you get bourbon what if?

Speaker 1:

yeah, but they make rye outside of the US right?

Speaker 2:

No, they do.

Speaker 1:

There's ryes made outside of the United States. I thought you had to.

Speaker 3:

No, you have to make bourbon, yeah, in.

Speaker 1:

American barrels, holy shit. But I think you can make rye outside of the United States.

Speaker 3:

Bourbon has to be made in the.

Speaker 1:

United States.

Speaker 3:

And Tennessee whiskey. I'm pretty sure there's like.

Speaker 1:

Canadian rye whiskey and.

Speaker 2:

Japanese rye whiskey Whistlepig.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, I'm pretty sure that Whistlepig is Canadian. Yeah, it's just bourbon.

Speaker 1:

So I would choose rye then, because then I get all of them still, but it's only the ryes.

Speaker 3:

Can rye whiskey be bourbon.

Speaker 2:

People are dumb. Anytime I have a dumb question.

Speaker 3:

I open up a private browser I don't even Google to know how much of an idiot I am and I Google my stupid questions.

Speaker 1:

I don't watch porn on the open browser. I don't go fuck. Well, that's different.

Speaker 2:

I don't care if you watch porn, but I don't want to think I'm an idiot.

Speaker 1:

Outside the US when I type in 18-year-old girl in one day old porn just. Google gets a little suspect of me, for sure. Yeah, you can make it right anyway. Yeah, I appreciate it. It's just bourbon, what? Yeah, you can make rum anyway. Yeah. Yeah, I'd choose that, I appreciate it.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I get all. It's just bourbon. Can I answer for?

Speaker 3:

that, what, what, what spirit would you choose? It'd be rum, right, yeah, I mean, I get all the cocktails with rum, right, like I could drink this forever, I think I don't know. Bourbon is pretty great, though. It's like number two and just because it's literally just because of where I work and because I've had so many opportunities to try some cool bourbons that I'm like that makes yours 10 years.

Speaker 1:

Oh, fuck me. If you come in the north I will pour you some, so come on.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, I'll be there, I'll be there.

Speaker 1:

You guys want to know about what I'm doing on Zach's birthday.

Speaker 3:

Hold on, you have to answer my question. Yeah, that's right?

Speaker 1:

Okay, go ahead, dude, I'm getting fitted for new clubs tomorrow. You know what that means.

Speaker 1:

No, you know what a fitting is yeah, I know you're getting new clubs, but like oh, you're tall, so no, so a fitting for new clubs is so I'm going to Golf Galaxy and they have like a fitting master. They have a guy that they hire who gets paid $10 an hour. He probably gets paid a lot more than that. So he works at the shop. He's a great golfer and what you do? You get a two-hour appointment. So I have to pay for this appointment and then I'll also have to pay for the clubs, but so the appointment is for my two hours with this gentleman.

Speaker 3:

And he's going to watch me hit my clubs.

Speaker 1:

Then he's going to recommend some other sets that they have in the store and I'm going to also hit those clubs. Then we're going to find out, like, what feels good Like distance-wise. He's going to find out like what feels good, uh, like distance wise. He's gonna see you like like I'm a high handicap golfer, which means like I'm not that good.

Speaker 3:

I'm like I'm like a minute yeah I'm like minutes I break 100, but that's like but you get premium parking at the at the golf course.

Speaker 1:

No um, if I not that dumb, if I shoot, I usually shoot anywhere from an 85 to a 95. That's like that's pretty good, it's better than an average. I have some bad days where maybe I'll shoot over 100, but for the most part I'm under 100. So this guy he's a three handicap. That means he usually shoots par on most courses.

Speaker 1:

Sometimes he shoots three over, so like this guy could like if he like quit his job, he could maybe try to go pro Like that's how good this guy is, because if you become a professional. You just pay money. You're just like, hey, I'm going to enter a tournament, but you will at least start to try Not to be on the PGA.

Speaker 1:

But to start like try not to be on the pga, but to start like your journey to the pga, you just start paying money. You're like, hey, here I'm gonna play in this tournament. Um, so this guy's really good. So he's watching me swing for two hours. Well, he'll watch me probably swing my clubs for like the first three minutes and I'll be like, all right, we're gonna try this.

Speaker 1:

And then he's gonna give me some more clubs and he's gonna be like, all right, we should probably extend your clubs like an inch because you're tall, because I already golf with clubs that are extended an inch. But maybe he'll recommend I only extend them like half an inch because he's seen how I'm swinging. And then so I'm going to hit like every club on my bag a couple of times, so like pitching wedge through like through four. So I'm just going to sit there and like hit a bunch of balls. He's going to watch. Then I'm going to hit other sets of clubs. I'm going to see what I like, see what he thinks I'm hitting. Well, see like how the ball's reacting, how my club faces reacting, all that, and then I'm going to do the same thing with my driver.

Speaker 1:

I'm going to hit my even putting, so I'm gonna go home and put some balls for him. He's gonna be like what do you like to like weight distribution? You want speed of a the putter face and he's just gonna like walking through all the shit two hours and apparently it's pretty exhausting. I think I was like be ready to hit like at least a hundred golf balls Tomorrow, two hours, where nor I usually hit 90 golf balls in the span of four and a half hours.

Speaker 1:

when I'm golfing a normal course, this is just that condensed yeah. I set all that up for tomorrow and so hopefully I'm probably going to end up spending somewhere between $1,500 and $2,000 tomorrow. I'm also trading in my old clubs, so that'll help Got anything good in there.

Speaker 1:

No, my clubs are really old, they're like 12 years old. I really like them still. Golf technology advances pretty quickly as far as them just doing new things with club faces or shafts or grips or whatever the fuck they got going on. So, honestly, I can probably add 10 to 15, maybe even 20 yards to all of my clubs just by getting new ones. Not changing anything, just buying brand new clubs that have the credit to give you the right clubs.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, exactly, and that's the other clubs yeah exactly.

Speaker 1:

And that's the other thing I'm hitting clubs that are pretty forgiving because when I bought them I wanted something super forgiving because I didn't always hit the ball correctly. Now that I've been golfing more and I hit the ball correctly more often than not, I can buy clubs that are a little less forgiving, but they go a little bit further because they're built a little bit differently. Hopefully that'll just improve my game. Maybe I'll start shooting in the low 80s by the end of the summer. If I can break 80 twice, that would be cool. If I shot a 78 twice I'd be like fucking, I'm the best.

Speaker 3:

Money well spent, but you need to get around 60 if you want to go pro right.

Speaker 1:

So most pars on courses are anywhere from like 72 to 76.

Speaker 2:

That's most courses.

Speaker 1:

If you can hit par on courses like you're doing good, if you can start shooting like 68's, 67's, then you think about I'm gonna go. If you're under par on most courses, then you should maybe think about going pro. But until then I don't think I'll ever be that good in my lifetime.

Speaker 3:

I think I'm already that good, I just won't give it a chance.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I believe you. It looks like you got a good stroke, buddy.

Speaker 3:

I do got a good stroke. I do stroke my buddies. Good yeah, and.

Speaker 1:

I never planned on being that good, but for me it'd be really fun if I'm going out twice a week, dude, if I shot like out twice a week, like dude, if I shot like a 75, I'd just be like dude. I would have so much fun golfing Like I'd have a great time. Now it would just be amplified because I'd just be like all these shots I'm hitting are great, but it'll take people golf. They just get mad.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, golfing is hard and they break their clubs and they're rich, yeah yeah.

Speaker 1:

Clubs rich, yeah, yeah those clubs are expensive anytime I've ever thought about like I got mad. I'm never like I can take it out on my clubs.

Speaker 3:

I'm like I don't have money. I would like a controller, because they're you do yeah like I would never smash my keyboard I would never smash my joycons on my switch no, this is uh sixty dollars yeah, they're way overpriced. That's crazy yeah.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, so I'm very excited about it. I'm also a little nervous Because I'm like what if I show up in swing and this guy's like this kid's dog shit, like I know he's?

Speaker 2:

not going to say that. So his job also isn't to like fix my swing.

Speaker 1:

He just wants to see me swing, so he can recommend something that might help me.

Speaker 2:

So I'm not paying for it this isn't a lesson.

Speaker 1:

He's just there to be like okay, I see what you're doing, we should try this, this should help what you're doing, and then we'll go from there and then buy some new clubs and then maybe at the end he'll be like maybe you should take some lessons, which I actually want to do. If I keep golfing this much, I think I'll eventually take lessons. I'll get some guy to help me perfect my swing. But as of right now, I'm just having fun golfing and I'm golfing like twice a week, so I might as well invest in some clubs.

Speaker 3:

Yo, you know what Me and Keegan and you and Campo should go golfing.

Speaker 1:

You could.

Speaker 3:

Me and Keegan, we'll ride in one cart because we'll be just getting hammered. I'll be flirting with the ball girl and cart girl the whole time.

Speaker 1:

We have a viral cart girl here in Vegas and she works at the course I'm going to on Saturday this week.

Speaker 3:

If you see her, you should be like oh my god, is that a viral cart?

Speaker 1:

I don't even know who she is, it's just campus was talking about it.

Speaker 2:

You gotta let me take a shot out of your belly she apparently just has big ass titties yeah what else do you need from a cart girl?

Speaker 1:

you just need to have big titties so that after you order drinks from her and you're like thanks so much and drive away, she'll be like damn. You see her fucking titties, oh dude.

Speaker 3:

You think she'll be impressed if I do a donut in this golf cart.

Speaker 1:

No, she will not. She'll probably be like who the fuck is this jackass, Jackass? What I heard was impressed She'll be.

Speaker 3:

like I need to mop up the entire golf course because of how drenched I am right now.

Speaker 2:

And this is grass.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, I'm about to water the yard baby, I might be more excited for your birthday than you are.

Speaker 1:

I'm fucking pumped.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, dude, I was pretty pumped. I work tomorrow, so it's like yeah that's okay, I'm also working tomorrow so.

Speaker 2:

Oh yeah, I work tomorrow so it's like yeah.

Speaker 3:

That's okay. I'm also working tomorrow, so also just another day. I'll text you at midnight because we'll probably be playing games or something. I'll just be like, hey, happy birthday, yeah.

Speaker 1:

That can be the first to say on national public radio happy birthday.

Speaker 3:

Thank you. But if you want to go out for a drink or something after work, you know For sure. Birthday Thank you. But if you want to go out for a drink or something after work, you know for sure. Or if you don't for sure, I might just want to come home and play games and just fucking veg out Sounds like a great day.

Speaker 1:

Drink some of this Howl Mob bourbon whiskey. Hey, he's got to drink his own stuff you can drink some VEP chartreuse.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, hey Norm, hey Zach. I've been streaming a bunch this week. I noticed Like five or six times yeah, I'm still unsubscribing. Fuck you, dude, that's okay, I just wanted it to be. Now I'm going to come back. No, yeah, no, I've noticed.

Speaker 1:

I've noticed. I just haven't had time to tune in because I think most of the days you streamed I was doing nothing but golfing, working and then sleeping, so like I didn't have time for anything else.

Speaker 3:

Streams have been pretty good so far. I mean, I'll probably play games tonight. Yeah, I do, I mean I have to.

Speaker 1:

My fitting is at 9 am, but like that's literally I'm off tomorrow and that's all I have to do, so I don't really care if I wake up, I go to the fitting and then I come home and nap. I don't give a shit. So I might stay up a little late tonight. We'll see.

Speaker 3:

We shall see.

Speaker 1:

I also don't want to show up there and like fucking, feel like dog shit and be like fuck, I've got to hit 200 balls right now because that would suck. I definitely have to wake up early enough to like stretch and get coffee.

Speaker 2:

I definitely need coffee on my way.

Speaker 3:

You better stretch it out.

Speaker 1:

I'm nervous, I don't know why. Because it's like they're helping me. I got a little feeling in my tummy, it's like first day of school I saw him when we were there.

Speaker 3:

He's kind of cute. He's Asian. I love Asians. What's it called Yellow Fever? I was in the jungle.

Speaker 1:

I was like, oh, that's black people. I what's it called Yellow Fever. I was like, oh, that's black people. I love Asians. Mostly they're women, but the dudes are cool too.

Speaker 3:

I think this episode's going to get aired on Juneteenth.

Speaker 1:

Really.

Speaker 2:

No, today's the 11th. If it was tomorrow, yeah, if it was tomorrow.

Speaker 1:

Well, happy Juneteenth.

Speaker 3:

Next week we'll just film a Juneteenth-themed episode where we all do blackface and the big red lips, and I'm going to look like Mr Popo and I'll make this an offensive cocktail.

Speaker 1:

And it'll be called the blackface cocktail.

Speaker 3:

It'll be called blackface. Yeah, and it's going to be offensive in flavor, not in racial themes. And it's going to be offensive in flavor, not in racial themes.

Speaker 1:

I'm not going to be here next week.

Speaker 3:

Oh, are you ready?

Speaker 1:

No, I am, that was Jack. Jack, it was the Zoke.

Speaker 3:

It was a joke, I get it now. Yeah, I actually already have an idea.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, stop, we're just going to stop Fine fine.

Speaker 3:

I'll make it for you guys. I won't tell anybody what my drink is, but I got an idea. We're probably on social medias If you want to know what my great drink is. We're probably not going to do that. So why don't you just tell everybody what the? I'll just post it next week on the day and yep, cool, now it's a surprise.

Speaker 2:

Limp biscuit?

Speaker 3:

No, it's a white guy.

Speaker 1:

But it's a biscuit that's limp, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1:

That's all I had to talk about this week. Guys, those are the two things. That's pretty good you guys weren't too into golf, but I love it.

Speaker 3:

I'm not into golf. I play PGA on the Wii a lot. That was pretty fun. Yeah, I also like Wii Golf Mario.

Speaker 1:

Golf.

Speaker 3:

Mario Golf's okay.

Speaker 1:

The one on the Wii's okay, the one on the GameCube was goaded. The one on the Switch.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, the Switch. Sorry, gamecube, GameCube was the goaded the Switch one was mid. Nintendo 64. No, I'm thinking of Tennis.

Speaker 1:

No 64 might have had a golf.

Speaker 3:

I don't know, but I was thinking of tennis.

Speaker 1:

Mario Tennis is really good.

Speaker 3:

You guys want to see a picture or a video of Taylor Swift picking a booger on stage.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, does she eat it afterwards. No, look at her, dude. She's so unattractive.

Speaker 3:

They caught her. Look at that. Look at that little loogie of a snot booger. What that's not a little booger.

Speaker 2:

Dude, that's a lot of boogie. Yeah, bro, do you see anything?

Speaker 1:

on my story today about what Travis Kelsey said no. He was like yeah, put the whole load on me and I was like dude, that's fucking sus as fuck, dude.

Speaker 3:

Pause that shit.

Speaker 1:

I don't know Could have gone south in those. She's so not attractive, though, dude.

Speaker 3:

She's like an average looking white girl. She's like a five I'll give her six, I'll give her five. There's nothing about her.

Speaker 1:

That appeals to me.

Speaker 2:

No.

Speaker 1:

She's just there. Yeah, she's not bad to look at either, but she doesn't do anything.

Speaker 2:

I'll give her five because she's not bad to look at either, but she doesn't do anything because she's just like if she walked by me, I wouldn't double take.

Speaker 1:

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no no no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no no no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no no no, no, no, no, no no no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, brother, he definitely.

Speaker 3:

If she walked by, he'd be like is that taylor swift dude? That shit was hot, bro, dude, you know it, bro, I'm a dog I can pull, you can pull Taylor Swift. I would change her life.

Speaker 1:

You would make the right joke and then she'd be like I like this guy. And then you'd be in.

Speaker 3:

He's so edgy and quirky.

Speaker 1:

He's so different and Travis Kelsey also has a mustache, so she definitely likes the mustache. So, uh, the most banging C banging custody walked in today and they were just waiting for diana sorry, I shouldn't say this, dude. She came in on like sunday too. I was like fuck, yeah, good to see you again she's the best dude I know.

Speaker 3:

No, no, just a rando but this random girl came in and she was with the man's. Man's was mids, but she was like really hot. And he made some terrible joke up front and then left and I was like, oh, she likes jokes. I'm going to take this woman any second. Give me one chance.

Speaker 1:

Did you no, why not? I didn't get a chance.

Speaker 3:

You should have stolen the chance. Yeah, I should have just punched her man in the face, knocked him out in the bathroom, picked up the toilet and then got out there and then pissed on him and then.

Speaker 2:

And then it's to his girl, right, and you got to tell him, yeah, and then maybe he's got a lack of soul that she peed in my bar stool. That she.

Speaker 1:

R-Colored you that she peed on you, yep, and you and you drank it up.

Speaker 3:

Yep Like Arco. And then I had color to my yeah Did.

Speaker 1:

Arco drink the pee as well. Probably he was peeing on girls, right yeah?

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, not okay, not okay.

Speaker 1:

No, don't. First of all, don't pee on anyone unless they really want it, and make sure they're of age if they really want it.

Speaker 3:

And make sure they're of age if they really want it and even if they're begging you and you got a triple check you got a follow-up question, yeah that's something where you're like you know one why

Speaker 2:

if she's like it's gonna get me off like I fucking love it you have to be like are there other ways?

Speaker 1:

all right yeah, is there anything else I can do for you? Or like is this it? And if she's like, this is absolutely it, just please, I really want you to pee on me and then she's like we'll lay down some towels and make it yeah we'll make it as clean as possible, but she's like I just need it. Then you go, let me see her. And then, after she confirms she's 21, I'm gonna say, man, I don't care if 18 is legal, you got to make sure it's 21.

Speaker 2:

To get peed on, you got to be 21.

Speaker 1:

That's the law.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, it's not, but it's the law. It's the law.

Speaker 1:

You got to be, at least 21 to get a little going shower. That's the law, and then absolutely, I'm pulling down my pants, I'm unloading my piss on her. For sure, if all the boxes are checked, you are getting so much piss, it's time for the moment you've been waiting for. I'm going to aim right for your belly button.

Speaker 3:

I'm going to try to fill it up and just have it keep splashing out. I'm going to aim for your eye.

Speaker 2:

Why the fuck am I not going to? Move, I'm going to forcefully piss into your eye.

Speaker 3:

Bro, what are you talking about, man? I'm talking about peeing.

Speaker 1:

Peeing on girls my favorite topic. Yeah, I don't think I'm into that.

Speaker 3:

I don't think I'm into that one. I'm into it a lot. I mean, it definitely doesn't get me off. I've been peed on before, though On accident.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2:

By who? I don't want to say names. By a girl? Yeah Well, I've been accidentally peed on by a guy.

Speaker 1:

What Unbeknownst to him we were a bunch of kids in fucking Florida.

Speaker 1:

We were playing hide-and-go-seek in this forest that was in my backyard. I literally had a forest in my backyard because we lived on a golf course. So all these kids were playing hide and seek and we used to fuck with the golfers. So they used to go to tee off and we'd like scream shit, to like make them Cause, like they didn't know we were in the woods right behind the tee box, yeah. And so there's one time we were just like fuck around and we we noticed before we were fucking with them.

Speaker 1:

This one guy came to piss and I hid it right behind the tree he went to piss on and I was in like flip-flops because I was in Florida like it like sandals.

Speaker 1:

Yeah they're strapped to my feet but their sandals probably start peeing and the pee was hitting the ground and just splashing like around the tree on my foot. But I didn't want to like see, so he didn't know the tree onto my foot, but I didn't want to see anything, so he didn't know Because I didn't want him to know. I was there but I got pee-tinkled by another man on my foot.

Speaker 3:

And then they eat the poo-poo. Ooh Norman got R Kelly canceled that man. What's his name? What's his social.

Speaker 1:

Let's get this Donald Trump Dude. That's fine, he's already locked up.

Speaker 2:

No, he's not locked up.

Speaker 3:

He's already a convicted felon. He's already going to be the next president.

Speaker 1:

He's going to get shot by me.

Speaker 2:

Whoa.

Speaker 1:

We'll bleep that out.

Speaker 2:

I'm editing, I'll bleep it out.

Speaker 3:

What are we talking about before peeing on kids?

Speaker 1:

No, we're talking 21-year-old women. It was after that, uh, let me talk about before peeing on kids. No, we're talking 21 year old women, right?

Speaker 3:

uh, it was after that, but before you got a number dude, I got peed on real good.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I hated it though. Hi, welcome to chili's that's the same forest.

Speaker 2:

That, uh, my brother got stung by like 100 wasps.

Speaker 1:

That one time it was pretty scary. There was like a wasp nest that he fucked with. He threw rock at it. Sounds like your brother deserved what he got, 100%. He's a dumbass. Yeah, his whole arm was just lit, the fuck up.

Speaker 3:

Just an arm, that's fine, I think it was mainly his arm.

Speaker 1:

He might have got one or two other places, but his right arm was fucking torn the fuck up. That's funny as hell. Yeah, dude, that's what you get for throwing rocks at a wasp. Yeah, exactly, I don't know what you expected to happen, but it was that for sure. Kids these days, kids these days don't be throwing rocks at wasps. Yeah, dude, go have some fun, have some fun, get into some trouble. Go out in the forest Do some dumb shit.

Speaker 3:

You ask a some trouble go out in the forest do some dumb shit. You got a kid. Today you're like, hey, you want to go fucking fuck with that wasp's nest over there. They'll be like what? But that dude yeah I feel like, like is that part of your daily challenge?

Speaker 1:

that's kind of what made us smart though right, because we would just go out and do dumb shit. And then we'd be like, oh, we shouldn't be doing that dumb shit. Like we just did that dumb shit. It didn't work out well. Maybe we'll do other dumb shit in the future, but like at least I know I learned that if I do this dumb shit, this is the consequence.

Speaker 2:

Like maybe we are Like kids, they'll just be doing nothing, so they don't know.

Speaker 1:

And then the first time they do dumb shit they're like 22, and they're like what do you mean? I didn't draw over that. Well, if you would have fucking done some dumb shit when you were younger, maybe you wouldn't know.

Speaker 3:

You should have thrown a rock at a wasp's nest.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, at a wasp's nest. Get in trouble while you're young, so you don't do it when you're older and you'll actually get real consequences for it. For sure, take advantage of being young by getting in jail, you'll go to jail if you do something dumb that you could get away with as a kid.

Speaker 2:

I've thrown rocks at cars before. If you do that when?

Speaker 1:

you're 21,. You're going to fucking prison. If you're 19, you can sleep with underage girls. Dude, yeah, if you're 16, you can fuck a 15-year-old. You can.

Speaker 3:

Probably. I actually don't know about that.

Speaker 1:

No, maybe not in Nevada If you're 15, though you can fuck 15-year-old Probably Maybe, I still don't know.

Speaker 2:

You might not have sex. I don't know. You know what?

Speaker 1:

I take back that part, but still get into trouble, you can definitely smell your teacher's seat after she stands up, and all she'll do is yell at you.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, you can put a thumbtack on it.

Speaker 2:

Maybe she'll tell your parents.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, you want some rest. You better have a bad motherfucking teacher.

Speaker 1:

Who's your baddest?

Speaker 2:

teacher.

Speaker 1:

Oh fuck, what's her name, what's going?

Speaker 3:

on. For me it was Miss Dominguez, and she taught 10th grade US history. She was the baddest one, oh fuck or Mrs Lopez, my second grade teacher, but she was married. My second grade teacher, but she was married. So what was her name?

Speaker 1:

She wanted me, though I always thought we had this teacher named Miss Knight who was like cute she wasn't bad, but like cute yeah, I was like she's cute. And then we I can't remember, miss, it's like Landthrope.

Speaker 3:

Liz, liz Thrope, liz Thrope.

Speaker 1:

Landthrope, something like that. She was like a science teacher, but she's dumb. She's dumb. Did you have her or was she just at your school? No, yeah, I had her for like one year. Yeah, yeah, she's dumb. Zach Dude, I heard third grade mischievous. Third grade you were brinked up in class like two or third grade. You were brinked up in class like two.

Speaker 3:

Oh, you did. That was the moment it registered with me, I'm pretty sure. Actually, like I remember my older brother, I think he picked me up from school or something and uh, or like he was with me like at school saw my teacher and then he was like your freaking teacher is pretty hot and I was like a kid and I was like what? But yeah, I get what you're saying you know that means nothing to me right now, but I get it because it's a yeah, like I've been missing.

Speaker 1:

Miss night was like one of my middle school teachers, but I was in like seventh grade, more so in high school.

Speaker 3:

It was definitely miss pears, pears on a math teacher like uh, junior, sophomore and senior year dude, she would always come into school with these nice dresses and she had fucking. She had a body on her. You could tell, bro, like she never wore anything too revealing, but you were like you got a body, all right. And then we would like constantly cat call her in class.

Speaker 2:

We'd be like looking good and she'd be like, okay, looking good today, ms Perry.

Speaker 3:

And she'd be like okay, we're going to talk about the Pythagorean theorem.

Speaker 1:

You'd be like yeah what are those what? Are you doing that's too much, then you'd probably take out the middle class. What was cool, though, I did my favorite teacher growing up, though, that I was like a student aid for and shit he ended up fucking a student and I was like hell yeah dude, I was like, that's why you're my fucking favorite, what he's got that dog in him.

Speaker 3:

Bro, are we talking high school now? Yeah, high school.

Speaker 1:

So it was legal. I think he just got fired. Oh, so he's like an 18-year-old student, I think well Vegas 16 is legal. It might have been 16 through 18, though she could have been 18.

Speaker 2:

He just got fired he didn't go to jail.

Speaker 1:

He's a dog for real. I respect that man to this day.

Speaker 3:

I went to this day to a magnet school and our EMS EMT teacher was having a lesbian affair with one of the students. That's so hot, no, no, that's students. That's so hot, no.

Speaker 2:

She's not hot.

Speaker 1:

Was it a hot student?

Speaker 3:

Surprisingly, the student was out of the teacher's league for sure.

Speaker 1:

Nice.

Speaker 2:

That's how creeps get them. She's a lesbian.

Speaker 1:

She fucking groomed the girl.

Speaker 3:

The law forced them to break up.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, Good for them.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, good for them, good for them.

Speaker 1:

And if you're listening to this and you have a hot teacher, go for it. Yeah, the worst that happens is they say no.

Speaker 3:

The worst that happens is they say yes and then you sleep with them and they lose their job and their lives are ruined.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, but you've got to fuck the teacher. No, do it, because you'd be the fucking shit. You'd be so cool, you'd be the coolest Everyone would be like you're the coolest.

Speaker 3:

There's this story of a teacher who slept with a middle school student and then she went to jail. The whole time she was in jail she was still in love with this student. They were writing notes to each other and visiting each other every day. Then she got out and she got back with this student and then I think he went to jail for something, and then she was still in love with him while he was in jail.

Speaker 3:

It was a beautiful story. Anywho, they had a baby, and that baby was a serial killer or something.

Speaker 1:

Hell yeah, dude, that's the way to raise them yeah. So raise them young, raise them fast, raise them to kill.

Speaker 2:

That's good. Raise them to eat ass.

Speaker 3:

We did good. We did good boys.

Speaker 2:

We did good.

Speaker 1:

Do we feel good? Yeah, dude, this bourbon is fucking delicious, dude, yeah, I'm going to go ahead and finish this we'll finish the podcast yeah dude, damn Norm, you have to slam yours now that's my second one. Oh okay, you have to slam it. Alright, that sounds good, bitches. Bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye bye, bye, bye bye bye, bye, bye, bye, bye, bye bye, bye, bye, bye, bye.

Speaker 1:

Like to do um? I've never tried, but probably you want to go for it. Not like with me, right? Like we'll buy you a dildo and we'll just watch.